good work keep it up………… infact keep it up m wid u????
Actually the people who r against it are actually those who r animals they themselves i think get animal instinct by seeing such things…. and ha afcrse the so called senior citizens … i meaan wat the heck … abhi unke zamaney ka gana hi lelo “khullam khulla pyar karenge hum dono” they like listening to the song bt they mind ppeople who r in love ….. i dont get them….
anyways guyz and gals three cheerz for the mantra….
“khulam khulam pyar karenge hum dono”………
anyways cheerz…….

They are morons(read police) who are out to just make money of this law loophole and out there to trouble the new generation.
Public affection of love can never be obscene.However some limit everyone understands and how can kissing be considered obscene.I wish people around us wake up and understands and start accepting the reality soon that the world is changing and young generation is going global with all means of communication and seeing freedom to express one’s affection and feelings across the globe and same suppressed in his/her own country(INDIA) will only create hard feelings for ones own people.
Accept the change.There is no vulgarity involved.

Well … yes this really unfortunate but if you see the deep root cause of the given problem i.e its because of the frustration of all people who were never able to do such thing in public because of their family constraints so they won’t want anyone else also not to do the same thing i.e if they can’t enjoy then why the hell the other should enjoy!!! …. There is a simple philosophy i.e if a person himself/herself isn’t happy then he can’t see other people around him happy either !

In this matter the indian government can be compared with the Taliban.

Democracy is the government of the people, by the people, for the people.

Greetings,
Naddu

Correction: basic needs* The subject does stir me a lot!!!

Thanx,
Naddu

hey Prerna,
That is a very daring attempt to show the face of young India… Keep it up girl, as a matter of fact, i come from a small tow, but I am very liberal, my family tries to ‘hold me to the ground’ but i don’t think any one can stop people like us in today’s India. With more than 60% of the population under the age of 30, India is one of the youngest countries in the world, n having liberal rules will only help the new India progress at a faster pace…

@Prerna

Wait: 1. Indian court accept the case.
2. It gave verdit in favor of couple.

(India is a great democracy. It looks like disorganised but IT WORKS AS A PERFECT DEMOCRACY)

Hi Aussie,

one of my indian friends is lawyer, I have asked him for the special law that restricts people in matters of affections. I´m still waiting for his response.
I hope he´ll make me clever, he meant he would only want to tell me when I promise to commit the offence with him… lol

Have a great day!
Naddu

I wish to commit such an offence and face court(if verdit is assured in my favor)

IN INDIA, YOU CAN PEE IN PUBLIC BUT CANNOT KISS IN PUBLIC
Such is the rotten state of Indian civilization. That one can pee in public. But kissing in public is an offence. Sometimes i feel so ashamed to be an Indian. That i just want to bury myself in the ground.
And repression excites the ‘animal instinct of men’ and not kissing or any other expression of love.Rape is from repression .Not from expression. Countries where there is a culture of public display of affection, like Italy. also report the lowest cases of molestations and sexual assaults on woman.
Open sex and open kissing are two of the pillars of a free, modern and educated society.Lets pursue them.take care.love ankur.

Why Do We Kiss?

Just think of being in front of a warm cracking fire with you partner in your hands, with a kiss and a cuddle. But have you ever thought about why people kiss? It could be a greeting or a sign of affection, but we all kiss.

Origin of the kiss

The strangest theory on the history of the kiss that I have heard finds its roots in the age of the cave man. It is thought that in primitive times that a mother pre-chewed the food for her baby and transferred it ‘in a kiss’. Although this could never be proved, it would explain why the kiss is a sign of affection, between mother and child and later, adults.

The second theory that I found was that the kiss was reflected in the Ziller Valley of Central Europe, where the exchange of pre-chewed tobacco between a male and a female was common. The young man would let a tip of the piece of tobacco, or spruce resin, etc rest between his closed teeth and invite the girl to grasp it with her teeth — which of course obliged her to press her mouth firmly on that of the young man — and pull it out. If a girl accepted the wad of pre-chewed tobacco, it meant she returned the boy’s love.

The third theory that I found was from a religious or sacred origin. There have been examples from around the world, as early as 2000 BC, which show that people could have brought their faces together to symbolise spiritual union. Even in the Indians culture, it was believed that the exhaled breath was part of the soul, and by two people bringing their mouths together, showed the joining of their souls. (Another variation on this believed that kissing evolved from the smelling of a companion’s face as an act of greeting.)

Kiss through history

Even without fully knowing where the kiss came from, it is well known that the kiss has been with us for a long time.

In the sixth century in France, dancing was one way to display affection, and every dance was ended in a kiss.
Apparently, Russia was the first to incorporate the kiss into the marriage ceremony, where a promise was sealed with a kiss.
The Romans kissed to greet each other. One Roman emperor showed a persons importance by what part of his body they were allowed to kiss, from the cheek to the foot.
In 16th century England, the clove-studded apple originated. An apple was prepared by piercing it with as many cloves as the fruit could hold and then a maid carried the apple through the fair until she spied a lad she thought worth kissing. She would offer him the apple, and once he’d selected and chewed one of the cloves, they would share a kiss. After that, the apple passed into the man’s possession, and he would venture off in search of another lass to continue the game with.
At one stage it was even thought that people found kissing pleasurable because when the two lips met during kissing, an electric current was generated.
A kiss is a kiss

Now days, kisses range from small pecks on the cheeks as a greeting, to the use of the lips and tongue as a sign of passion. It is that action that causes hormones to be released into the blood stream when two people embrace, inducing a sense of euphoria that you feed (or feel?) in the sweetness of your lovers mouth.

It’s a kiss that brings every fibre of your being alive, turns your stomach over and sends Goosebumps up your spine. It’s a kiss that forgives your misdemeanours and smiles at your mistakes. Ingrid Bergman puts it together in that “a kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous”.

Good thoughts.

Would suggest to analyze the fact from both ends

Regards
raman

Prerna

Kissing is not a jurm

Regards

I was so surprised at how it made me feel when i couldnt even kiss or hug or hold my parnters hand in front of his friends. Being the fact that im an australian and used to public display of affection. I mean they Knew we were together, we sleep in the same bed so whats wrong with a lil hand holding. Its very prudent…even while they are hiding there lil undesired romance from the world, doesnt mean that i had to.
They made it sound as though men have no self control….why do u think that is??? becuz it has been made taboo to touch a woman unless she is bound to you by marraige!! Even the simplest innocent touch could be taken in a different way and all hell breaks loose. People want what they cant have, men and women alike. We all have carnal desire, but we also have the control to hold it back.

HI, PRERNA, indians are always tols to supress SEX, since centuries,so,evolutionary they are OBSSED for it,you know, it’s an HYPOCRITIC ART, to hide all our UGLYNESS,beneath silvery shining IDEALS,in pvt,no any other communit/ynationality can beat indians for there INCEST psychology,…………….tulsi(an ill-fated INDIAN)

I think we have to leave people to take a decisions on how they want to display there love. Every one in India is free to make decisions. I think some other group (e.g. Sene) is not allowed to make decisions on our behalf. I want to make point here that spread the knowledge about what is decent and what is not and then let people make decisions about it as it is there life and they have freedom to leave it as they want.

TO ALL THE FOOLS,
India never had a culture of Public Display Of Affection. Instances of people displaying their affection in public is rare. But the greatest display of public affection and couples kissing in public happens in mumbai.And Mumbai also has the lowest sexual crime rate against woman. So public display of affection is inversely proportional to crime against woman. More open sex and more open kisses. And woman will be safer.

Ankur honey;

how have you been you fearnaught?

The definition of the “word” husband is following:
WORD HISTORY: The English word husband, even though it is a basic kinship term, is not a native English word. It comes ultimately from the Old Norse word hsbndi, meaning “master of a house,” which was borrowed into Old English as hsbnda. The second element in hsbndi, bndi, means “a man who has land and stock” and comes from the Old Norse verb ba, meaning “to live, dwell, have a household.” The master of the house was usually a spouse as well, of course, and it would seem that the main modern sense of husband arises from this overlap. When the Norsemen settled in Anglo-Saxon England, they would often take Anglo-Saxon women as their wives; it was then natural to refer to the husband using the Norse word for the concept, and to refer to the wife with her Anglo-Saxon (Old English) designation, wf, “woman, wife” (Modern English wife). Interestingly, Old English did have a feminine word related to Old Norse hsbndi that meant “mistress of a house,” namely, hsbonde. Had this word survived into Modern English, it would have sounded identical to husband—surely leading to ambiguities.

By the way, marriage isn´t related to rape and if so, then it´s an abnormal action (violent/frustrated) and behaviour of the male gender, happens especially in those countries in which women aren´t appreciated equally,a married or single status doesn´t play a role here.

Greetings,
Naddu

@ ANKUR

Boss: You cooked up the definition & meaning of Husband.

@Mayank

I agree with you 100%. Those who have not seen “Real India” do make wrong claims. Bombay, Delhi or Gurgaon is not real India. Almost 69% population still lives in villages. Yes lots of educated people lives and work in Rural India but still masses have same traditional attitude. Female is a subject of Sex and Discrimination. Kissing is not acceptable.

Those who beat their chest of freedom about kissing in public places, try Kissing in Gulf Countries(or even in PAK) and I am sure people will reward you on the spot. If you and still alive, court will reward a jail.

OBEY THE LAW OF THE LAND and WHY NOT. IF ONE GOES TO A NUDE BEACH, HE “MUST WALK NUDE”. IF ONE GOES TO “ISLAMIC COURTRY” OBEY THEIR RULE. I DONT SEE ANY THING WRONG IN THAT.

Diversity is a beautiful.

@Naddu

OUR KIDS DO WHAT WE “DO”, NOT WHAT WE PREACH.

Dear friends,

I got confirmed what I already assumed, there´s no passage written in the Code of Indian Law that a kiss is illegal in public.
Obscene behaviour in public is prohibited, I got told it is a matter of interpretation. The police tends to define obscenity in public, they book a case in a haste, but ultimately it is quashed. You can say the police has unlimited power to book a person for anything.
When the matter comes before court, they get strictures from court and sometimes the officer is suspended for his misdemeanour. I think it´s a bad performance of the executive authority in India. They are too incompetent to know the Law, further they aren´t paid well.

This is a first hand account.

Greetings,
Naddu

Dear Prerna,
It is not a crime to kiss by a couple in public. Whereas our country is going behind due to this. As I have seen in some of countries in World like China which has a maximum population in the World and they does not stop like wise things in these countries. Sex is free in all these countries. If in our country we allow to free sex, crime must be lower than this.. In these days maximum crime in India is due to sex, for the sex or by the sex. So, you have taken a extreme step and if you need my held then you can write me again, I can take your step in my committee, which is known as National Human Rights Committee and I am the Presidnet of the same. I have attended so many meetings in international level of Human rights in India, austrlai, Newzeland, China, Hongkong etc.etc.
So, you have choose a nice topic and I am always with you. Jagdish..

hello ther,
i felt very happy that you have turned vegetarien ,i hav studied throughly in gujrati medium so ther`ll be some spelling mistakes in my replies so understand tht & neglect

well do eat egg?? that is also non,veg.

its like someone eating unborn babychild snatched from her mother`s stomach…

we must not make our stomach a graveyard.

i liked this topic but pink chaddi,public display of affection are useless topics to discuess.
it`s all the media who populerize it because they dont have any news that help inspire people.

you are smart & intelligent , so you may use your skills to publish topics that makes smile,points new attitude & way. you have chance & recongition you can do it.

for eg pink chaddi(i feel shame writing this two words,how funny & nonsense)
1st and foremost i`m confused whether to cry or laugh on our media.that they are so poor that they have no more news to boradcast???
media shuld negelct the incident tht few ppls enterd the club & hited couples & same to tht girl who introduced this idea.. how silly they are.

i dont know how i`m getting mails of Girl`s talk ,i`m male..well whatsoever…
you have potential to do something that is very positive & inspiring
i hope you`ll do it at ur best…

Dear Prerna,
Since we two belong to two different cultures and values for life, it seems sometimes too difficult to respond your blog rationally. Display of affection is again one thing and projecting erotic behaviour is something different. can you please tell me if kissing a small kid is same as kissing a hottie hugging her. This is not just the affection but lust. I hope you are getting me. You have writen in your write up that even Shilpa Shetty was not at all ready to be kissed like that means this was all one sided. she fell prey to Richard Gere and found it difficult to cope with. However she managed the show with her sheer dignity. Watching erotic movies or the busines of soft porn is not similar to this, for which people pay. But watching a couple kissing each other in public costs nothing to these spectators and of course allows a lot of unnecessary argument over the issues. While advocating the US culture please don’t criticise Indian culture. There people make lovers from among their blood relatives and even marry, which has, scientifically been proven wrong. We strongly believe that emotion is something not to exhibit or display in public else there will be no barrier between the public and private life.
Regards.
Pradeep

Depends upon the country and the view of people about the attitude of young guys
As far as Indian culture is concerned, it is not nice
This is my opinion.
Your wordings I like very much
Mohandas

yes im agree with u
we also published editorial on this issue
thankx again
urs
jjitanshu

Hello there, I’m Indonesian, a bit same culture with India. In my ops, grow up is adult. Adult is mature. self control is mature. expressions, excitement, if controlless, is just a kid things. I’m not hypcrt, I love kissing. But not in public area. Prerna, what are the culture, .. norms, means to you? Did what happened on the couple made you think that India culture need to be grow up? Here, I’w with you Pradeep. Hey you both have the same Gupta, is that a family name?

sinc,

alex

p.s. no pradeep and I are not related. Gupta is a very common last name in india

A private life doesn´t end when you close the door of your house and enter the streets.
What means public? Who defines public?
Everyone of us is a part of public. We are a part of our living space, so why should a private life end when you change the location? Do we leave our authenticity when we leave our house?
People eat and sleep on the streets, they do anything they usually do at home as well, why is a kiss or a hug suddenly a private matter? It is not private, it is one condition of a complete life!
Love and affection happens even too seldom on the streets, people are too busy, time is too short for a hug or a kiss… I´m not sure if anyone would perceive a kissing couple at all in the hectic of a daily life.

To me, a kissing or hugging couple is an enchanting and lovely sight!

Greetings,
Naddu

prerna, 1.Public Displays of Affection item has values diff for each time, mores, tribes,cultures. India has a notorious double standard when it comes to these dilicate bold matters. We find fault if a fem drops her sari sowing one brest. but dont mind many regional dresses with top and bottom without a chunni drape. 2.Gere kiss w shilpa is a common posture in the Salsa dance. 3. half the human mind is saintly and half otherwise.Till 1940 many areas in india were topless.many dances body movements and mudras are sex set to music.My submission is that moral policing by us and our uniformed keepers of decency shd be directed by simple sense of the era and area.

@ Prerna – I must say you have a highly patronising view of bollywood films. Please read the comment number 187 in your (absolutely idiotic, I might add) article about “Why did it take a westerner to make a good bollywood film” – first of all, the title is itself patronising, as I have mentioned in my comments, there have been any number of bollywood films greater than Slumdog and just because they have not won the Oscars is in no way a means of concluding that they are not good films. So stop making idiotic trash comments like “watching a bollywood movie is also a public affair.” in relation to talking about “erotic” or “sensual” stuff and “exciting animal instincts of men”. You are implying that watching a Bollywood film is like watching a “soft porn” movie and I can assure you, that being the case, watching Hollywood films is then a XXX affair and even far beyond!!! Making such unfair and wrong statements serves no purpose – Prerna, you seem to just take Bollywood as some sort of punching bag and criticise it at every opportunity! AGAIN, I SUGGEST YOU READ MY COMMENTS ON THAT SLUMDOG TRASH WRITE UP OF YOURS, COMMENT NUMBER 187 AND YOU WILL REALISE WHAT I AM SAYING!!! As far as this topic is concerned, I fully agree with AUSSIE – try kissing in Gulf countries (or even that failed state, “Porkistan”), you will get your just desserts – obeying the law of the land is paramount. Are all you Americans like this – you just try and push and shove your way into everything and alwyas want to have it your way, entirely disregarding all principles of propriety!!! Get a life, I say! And Prerna, one final point, I have gone through your profile and achievements, and while I am impressed with the fact that you are so educated and (apparently) “civilised”, I suggest you stop taking pot shots at India and bollywood sitting 1,000s of miles away in the US – in any case, we don’t need no lessons from you guys, the US is in DEEP SHIT!!!! Your useless leaders are gonne print dollars till they run out of resources to do so and the value of your currency will collapse and so will your economy, from all accounts!!! (I MUST SAY I WOULD NEVER WANT THAT TO HAPPEN, JUST TO CLARIFY!!!) So we really don’t need no American and pseudo-Indian telling us what to do and how to do it!

@ Tulsi – If you consider yourself an “ill-fated Indian”, it in no way reflects on India, but on YOU – it shows what a pathetic kind of a person you are. If you are so dissatisfied with your lot, why don’t you simply get out of the country and live somewhere else?!!? We can do without people like you!!!

@Aussie,

why would I ensure he has not eaten garlic or fish? I like it, I would rather care if he has brushed his teeth before kissing me incase we haven´t dined together lol

HARIT WROTE : “AND ONE LAST THING – SM IS NOT AN INDIAN/BOLLYWOOD FILM!!

ABSOLUTELY!!! ABSOLUTELY!!!

Why do people use abbreviations all the time, I find it wonderful what they create!

SM may refer to:

Automobiles
Citroën SM, an automobile
Spec Miata, a class of racing car
Places
SM postcode area, in London, England
San Marino, a sovereign nation located within the borders of Italy
Military
Soldier’s Medal, a military award of the United States Army
Organizations and businesses
SM Entertainment, a South Korean talent agency
SM Prime Holdings, a Philippine retail operator
Savoia-Marchetti, an Italian aircraft company
St. Mary’s Railroad, reporting mark SM
Swedline Express, IATA airline code SM
Science
Samarium, a chemical element, symbol Sm
Standard Model, a quantum field theory
Silty sand, in the Unified Soil Classification System
Sm, a type of spiral irregular galaxy, see Magellanic spiral
Technology
SmartMedia, a flash memory card standard
Security Module – a device providing security functions, e.g. encryption
Secure Messaging
.sm, San Marino top-level Internet domain
SM (plotting), supermongo – an interactive plotting software
SM (computer) — is an abbreviation for ‘System of Machines’. It’s the name of DEC’s PDP and VAX compatible computers developed in USSR. (Russian: ‘СМ’ — ‘Система Машин’)
Other uses
Sailor Moon, a Japanese media franchise
Sadomasochism, gratification in the infliction of pain or humiliation on another person
Service mark (℠), an unofficial trademark used for services rather than products
Space Marines, a fictional army in Warhammer 40k, a tabletop battle game.
Spesmilo, a unit of currency abbreviated Sm

Stephen Malkmus, lead singer of now-defunct Pavement
Master of Science, or Scientiæ magister, an academic postgraduate degree
Sailor Mercury
Sailor Mars
Specialist Mathematics, an advanced mathematical subject offered in Australian schools for years 11 and 12
Scarlet Monastery, an instance dungeon in the MMORPG World of Warcraft.

Thank you for this inspiring abbreviation Harit!

Looks like Naddu is in the mood for joking!

THANKS AUSSIE ,THANKS.
thanks for floating the idea of my and prerna getting together. I often dream of it. But its a pipe-dream. A rich stanford graduate like Prerna who wallows with the hunks of California may find little attraction in a penni-less rebel like me!

DEAR AUSSIE,
Your agreeing with a fool like mayank dismays me. U are confusing diversity with sectarianism. Burqas and other forms of clothing to veil oneself are a form of cultural pollution. Like Air-pollution. Aussie do u carry placards on the roads of Australia demanding that air-pollution be allowed besides clean-air. Because of diversity.Because u love diversity.
When u dont understand the meaning of diversity. Diversity comes only when there is full freedom for the individual to express himself. As a result there are millions of unique individuals. That is diversity. Having different groups with uniform practises is sectarianism and not diversity.India therefore is a sectarian country. Not a diverse one. Aussie i like u. Therefore i m telling u the above words. These words are originally mine. Excerpts from my upcoming novel.. That will be released around December..And yeah getting fucked by seven different australian girls
on the seven days of the week is the definition of diversity. Therefore practise diversity. take care.love ankur.

BOLLYWOOD STAR AKSHAY KUMAR IS READING PRERNA’S BLOG
Yeaterday in the India Fashion Week bollywood superstar Akshay kumar broke new grounds in Public display of affection. While on ramp he made his wife Twinkle open the button of his jeans with her hands. I think this is the most beautiful form of public display of affection. He probably must have been impelled to do that after reading Prerna’s piece on PDA. Jai ho akshay!jai ho prerna!

I agreed with you ,but as per our indian culture,its not acepted.pic,at any places,is seperate things,but,how can we acepts same openly.you please think if urs sister,or daughter is there,can u?

Dear P.Gupta

I understand your frustration over the issue. It is loobvious that the kind of movies are produced by bollywood the same is being depicted by the people. Neither I am in favour nor I have any thing to support the incident for the victims. But it is for sure, there always double standard of measuring every incurring case. Hence, the modesty is every considered as decent. Hope we follow.

Regards
Abdul Rauf Khan

I do not agree with you. Love is something which is private, between two people and it should be done privately only. Why should one go on public display. If there are no parks , that doesn’t mean that ppl will start loving on the middle of a road. In India, where 60% of the population is below poverty line, where a entire family stays in a single room house , so what should they do. Make love in parks bcz there is no place at home. That’s not the solution. That’s not the way you do or in that case any civilised society will do. The fact is that we are just running after the western culture blindly without bothering abt their implications. Free Sex, Pre Marital Sex, PDA, Live IN relationships, where all this leading us to. Look there is no harm indulging in sex with the consent of your partner but then it should be done in private places.

rgds
abhi

Hi,
am impressed .the topic u got is interresting and u wrote all abt is good.

I fully agree with you, every human being on earth should have their own freedom to live and do whatever they want to do it is upto an individual will and wish to excute an action as per his/her conscious, in this case of kissing if a person feels so embrassed by viewing a couple kissing in public place then he should not see the couple or close his/her eyes, and leave them alone and not make a fuss about it.

I fully agree that every human can feel free do to whatever they want to do.

Regards,

RAJESH.

Hi Prerna
i appreciate your ways of exposing our hypocritic attitude.
it is commondable and deserves a thought.
keep going
kindest regards
Nisar

@Naddu

I eat garlic all the time. When I wrote that she MUST not have eaten Garlic or Fish, I MEANT HER MOUTH “MUST” NOT BE STINKING.

@Naddu — i really like your idea of A DAY OF KISSES IN PUBLIC. perhaps we should suggest this to the Pink Chaddi ladies for their next stunt although unfortunately i’m sure this would provoke a violent reaction by Ram Sene…

Arguing about if PDA is an offence is subjective and many facts of the situation have to be considered. If commenting in general or formulating a policy to discriminate or not will depend on our society’s acceptance of the culutural exvhanges with others and its influence or adaptation by us and as well as them.
An ideal case would be that of an open society interacting at different levels with other societies and cultures and to very naturally adapt to different practices that individuals are comfortable to and that it is naturally acceepted by the society they live in .

Not treated as a foriegn influence which is taboo to our culture. So, I guess we have a long way to go and ofcourse as these new situations happen around us we will read more about mad reactions.

With referance to the fact that our society accepts soft porn in terms of posters adult movies played at public theaters etc and the non availability of parks to allow individuals of the freedom of PAD, I quite agree that subject of sex soft to hard is a common subject at different levels of our society.But it is also a fact that whoever goes to Goa men or women do not voluntarily or naturally get into biknis or beach wear but quite enjoy the sight of foriegners basking in the sun half nude or the scantiest of clothes on them. It is not a common sight for our society so we gape at them. While for them it would be abnormal not to be in beach wear on a beach. So we still have to go a long way.

In my own city there are lot parks where couples of all ages get very romantic behind rocks and bushes etc but you also have human monkeys preying on them and so very eager to relish a live scene.

This is the crux of it “Live scene”. Be it a lady in very exposing clothes.a couple PAD,
fashion shows and others which have a display of more skin than covered, are all so welcome to individuals in our society be it a male or female, it generates a level of curiosity which rides tham till the live scene is over !!

The after math is a rainbow of reactions, the intensity of criticism varies as the colours of it

Dear Prerna.
Kissing public might be offeence.But if it is shown in movies???? is that not an offence??
in public u can see ones and in movies u can see the same as much u want.

u also see nude picture.if any one walk nude on road will be put to shame and v talk about indian culture.but that if is shown in movies….. nothing will happen.not only that v hail them for their acting etc.

jacob

i personally dont see anything wrong with public displays of affection….if i had a girlfriend/wife…i wouldnt be embarressed by kissing or hugging her in public…theres nothing wrong with expressing your love to someone no matter where you both are…and if someone has a problem with it….they can turn away.

All valid points

Prema,

A married couple kissing near a train station is an expression of love but bollywood
film scenes are vulgar. Sub-Continent society has a lot of hypocracy when it comes to
sex. I know every guy there wants to have sex but if a girl does, it is bad.

Economics form social institutions. Sub-Continent was ruled by Great Britain for
200 years and did not allow the society to express their feelings. Our rulers (Nawabs)
had slave mentality and they treated their own people with contempt. However,
the time is changing. We are independent for 62 years and more people are getting
education. Despite disparity between rich and poor sub-continent is on the rise and
I am confident that within next two decades we will see a big economical and cultural
changes. These changes will definetly be positive.

Best Regards,

Waqas

thanks for sharing the good views of yours…………….

Dear Prerna,

thank you for your approval. Infact, I believe with appropriate soft actions people can achieve more than with words. A revolution made with love isn´t crime and will not provoke resentment. The more young couples join in, the better.

LETS INITIATE A “DAY OF KISSES IN PUBLIC” IN INDIA!!!

LOVE REVOLUTION!

This is an appeal to all young indians to fight for their personality rights! Don´t be devoting to any tradition that causes personal frustrations and limitates your freedom.
Only with actions you all will be able to force a change, don´t leave success to a destiny!

JAI LOVE!

@ Mohammad Syed Husain

Do you really believe Shilpa Shetty didn´t enjoy the kiss of Richard Gere? Had you not also enjoyed getting kissed by Shilpa Shetty? By the way, the scene was more a show act and not a real kiss. I couldn´t figure out any ting of lust in it. Incidentally, the whole matter happened on the occasion of an Anti-Aids Campaign, the purpose of the kiss was to show that a kiss doesn´t cause Aids, because a kiss isn´t sex! Or do you have sex when you kiss your child, your daughter or your son? Do you kiss them at all? When you kiss your wife or friend, do you feel always lust?

Had she not liked it she could have easily slapped his cheeks or kicked his bum. We women know how to defend ourselves when a kiss is unwanted…and at all, a man would not kiss a woman wouldn´t she agree. I have never ever observed this in the public.

You can procceed on the assumption that all kisses that happen in the public are wanted from both genders. If you feel disturbed by it, close your eyes and just wish it was you.

Thank you.
Warm greetings,
Naddu

WE NEED AN APPROPRIATE DATE, THEN SPREAD THE MESSAGE AND ANNOUNCE IT ALL OVER!

WONDERFUL!

Dear Prerna,
I support your view. Actually sex is between two ears and not between two legs.Unfortunately most of us think the other way.

Regards,
Pal

TO RAHUL AND OTHER SUPPORTERS OF PRIVATE DISPALY OF AFFECTION.
Dear Rahul,
Come to Khan Market in Delhi on Friday and Saturday evenings. You will find me displaying my public display of affection with some girl. I have been doing that for the last two years. And no supporter of private display of affection like u has dared to do anything to me . Because if they do i break their teeth. So open invitation to u. Come u supporter of private display of affection. And i will make a public display of ur teeth. take care.love ankur.

TO NADDU,
The idea of a day of kisses is welcome. Acts of violence and encroachment of somebody’s privacy cannot be justified on the grounds of public or private spaces. But i was looking forward to ur response to marital rape. How would u justify the million rapes of married women everynight by their dogs. Ahhhhh. Sorry i mean husbands for u .take care.love ankur.

I completely agree with what you say. Democracy allows one to do anything. Yes But in a controlled manner. When you are in Rome do as the romans do. So you follow the rules and traditions of the country.

You are contending about the number of public places alloted for kissing. Well there are none officially. N there should be none. There is something called the HOUSE or HOME SWEET HOME. which is very private. One can display your love there. One does not have to display love on the highstreets and parks. There are many places in the metro cities in India yes an ocassional kiss is not so great. Yes but you want to create a kissing record that certianly objectionable in public. As the tradition goes do it but dont do it in public. Be it dirty politic, drugs, women,kissing or sex.
The whole thing is that IF YOU WANNA DO IT. DO IT BUT NOT IN PUBLIC.

Few Questions:

> What is this ’sexual backwardness’? Is that something akin to economic backwardness, or social backwardness? If not, then lets not create terms which have no meaning or material impact on people’s life. Specifically because you are trying to prove a point. Please remember, when we use a term ‘Backward’, it has a negative impact on society/individual. And as far as I can see we are sexually very healthy and active society and thats the reason that we have such huge population. So, please refrain from using a term loosely

> Couple of other reasons and arguments that you provided in favour of PDA
– Why are we afraid of sex?
– Restriction of Sexual freedom
– Denying people the right to enjoy their love is a crime

Well, “People to have sex on street” also fits the above reasoning and should be allowed going by the same standards that you mentioned, as they fit in perfectly. So, should we be ok with “People having Sex on street”? If not, then we have to think if the above line of reasoning or argument are right or not.

And let me challenge you more on it with a more concrete example. There was an incident on a plane travelling between SA and London, where a businessman started having sex with his model Girl friend on plane, in front of other passengers and was booked for it. Now does that mean that the law was backward? Based on what you have mentioned, law was backward and theirs was an expression of sexual freedom. Right? I think ‘Wrong’. So what the reason that this happens.

The reason is that society has standards, which protects one person from offending the other person. If this line is breached, there are repercussions. If your argument is that society/people should not be bothered with what you/other people do, then re consider the plane example. Will you not be bothered if you see such an incident on your next seat? Will you not look down upon it and report it? If you will not be, then all is fine and you are not a hypocrite. If you are not fine and will be offended, then you are hypocrite. Because then you are trying to judge people by your standards, while you expect no one else to judge you by their standards. And these standards/ tolerance level is different across different society and culture.

Learn to understand them before blindly criticizing them. You can’t impose your standards on society and expect them to follow, as these standards are set by majority, not minority like us (And thats the twist- I am a minority like yourself, however with much more tolerence and understanding of standards which are set). And remember these standards are not all bad. They are very beneficial to us in daily life. If they were not set then you might have witnessed

- Girls being eve teased openly without any fear
- Elders and weak being laughed upon etc.

Just because west follow a different standard set by their society, doesn’t mean that standard is good. Indian soiety is moving at a different pace as is its economy.

Final comment: What does sexual freedom like you described, gets you? Are you richer? increases ur standard of living? I guess not. And if your arguement is that freedom is the end goal, then again go back to the plane example to bring contextlic will ‘excite animal instincts’ of men.
* my rebuttal: anywhere you go in india you will find the walls of dhabas and chai stands plastered with erotic bollywood posters. watching a bollywood movie is also a public affair. bottom line, there is plenty of voluntary public consumption of soft-porn across india, so i don’t think a loving kiss between two people is going to add much to the fray.
2. your argument: they can do whatever they want in private, but why must they do it in public?
* my rebuttal: there are no parks or beaches or other such romantic places to enjoy love in private. denying people the right to enjoy their love is a crime, in my opinion.

Just for fun, I collected a few photos of “public displays of affection” from around the world. Can you guess which couple is from which country? Here are a few options (not all will be used): Brazil, France, Italy, India, Morocco, Russia, Sweden, US

Dear Prerna, about your PDA,I have my observation that couple found loving each other in public have their own difficulties. In Mumbai many families leave togather in single room and have no privacy to express their love in presence of their family members and they have no choice but to express their love in corner of public places. There is no obscene if passing by public mind their own business leaving couple enjoy.

Unexpected topic got raised…Well all I can say is that It all depends on “PERSONAL CENSORSHIP”..Every individual has his or her own “LIMITS” …I wd refrain frm the
“INDIAN TRADITION” and oll…lot been said abt it)…well I cn understand @ times “DESPONDENCY” can lead AN INDIVIDUAL 2 DO “FEW THINGS” WIDOUT GIVING A HECK ABT D SURROUNDINGS…wELL ,I hv no complains abt nething…
But just dat some activities can lead to “DISCOMFITURE” for oders(especially wen dey r wid d family)…Few things are “IMPROMPTU”(understood)..but yaar jageh dekhke karo na…kisne roka hain?? U hv “DEDICATED” gardens…”COUPLE” of “COUPLE” seats @ multiplexes..(which is always dark…)!!! Lol…in case u don’t have “UR HOUSE AVAILABLE” during the “emergency”…my SYMPAThies are dere wid u….but the good thing iz dat u have friends who always come 2 d rescue @ critical times…I have a reasonable spacious house..in case any friends need it 4 “special purpose”..i am just a call away…cheers!!!

@ Moderator: can v hv some discussions on IPL(imminent political lethargy)?
I think u r quite upto date with current affaus…I wd love to hear what the people out here hv 2 say abt this…
Thnx in advance…

@Naddu — i sent Ms. Nisha Susan an email about your idea of A Day of Kissing in Public to get her thoughts on how we might approach such a demonstration. let’s see if we can make this happen! we should make sure to avoid violence at any cost, however, so we will need to be careful in how we approach it.

Dear Mam
I have been watching your two mails which were quite intresting and also debative.
Nice to have some new ideas coming out of the Indian girls but to what extent these ideas will penetrate is to be asked ? also the Thinking and Attitude has to change .

Good and Best of Luck
Do keep in touch.
Regards
Vishwanath

Good to know that there r senible people who think of love as affection, not a synonym for ’sex’, still in my country. Good Prerna…. continue spreading the message

Hello Prerna ji,

Once again a nice thought to ponder from you depicting existing multiple social standards/norms and different personal perspectives. Now about Public display of affection.

I have been traveling since 1979 various countries exposing me to various cultures and social setups and kissing had been one of the gestures to communicate yr affection. This also communicates the relation you have with the person u are kissing and is done differently for different relation and forms of affection. Different places of planting a kiss depicts as to whether it is affection or sex. Public display of sexual affection is termed to be obscene otherwise it is all fine by so called social norms.

Now is the difference of cultural traditions in every society in existence. So we follow the norms and called decent break the norms called indecent and unfit for that social setup. In view of this the view on this point cannot be generalized. Have to evaluated in terms of cultures, traditions, societies and so on.

We are often acclaimed to be Social Animals. The difference is we do not behave as animals and follow the social norms. Animals also show their affection as well as sex in public.

To me as human beings we have right display our affection for each other but some type of affection are very personal or out of a very personal emotions for each other like Act of love. So what we have for each other need to be displayed in public out of two reasons. One being that we want someone to know and make him/her feel jealous while the other we are afraid of dispossessing the relation. A fear in our mind somewhere let the public know it and scare other of the consequences. Sharing a personal moment of possessiveness with public has a element of fear and lacks the truth in relation a sort of hypocrisy about relation. May be such relation do not take you far.

Kiss on lips is not affection alone it is beyond affection a sense of very personal feeling of possessiveness and tantamount to sex in preface.

Anil Garg

dear prerna…..this is ur 2nd very impressive mail coming to me…sex in public…..but to what limit….i have seen people enjoying full sex in lonely places…when in india we have to act as per our culture…

regards shukla

gud article keep it up
i really apriciate u

Dear Prema,
I read with interest your reference to the case booked by a court against a couple for kissing in a public place. You had also justified the same because Bollywood movies have such scenes or dhaba posters are obscene or Prono films are available in plenty in India.

You had indicated that we in India are backward in sex related matters, which is objectionable. This is a country that gave Kamasutra to the world. We know that certain aspects of Sex is a reflection of DIVINITY. We are cultured enough to close with a curtain at the time of decorating the Statues(Vigraha) of Gods and Godesses. The sanctity behind this is very simple. Divinity and Obscenity differs by a thin film of barrior. If the sexual art is performed in a private place, both the minds would relish and bring reverence to the relationship. Sex performed in a public place attracts the mind of all those present and the two performing the act shall not relish. The diverted concentration bring a guilty feeling and Divinity disappears.

If you feel that giving more respect to SEX as an act of purity and divinity is backwardness, then, I feel that you should learn more to understand SEX and it’s Divinity.

With Best Wishes,
M.Ravichandran.

nice thoughts
please carry on

Thanks for your free views. I feel reasonable and decent display of affection, including a smooch, is not illegal and uncouth. India should accept the changed situation and sentiments.

Yes dear your are absolutely correct for we not having guts to discuss
any thing related to love/ emotions/ sex … you name anything… the
strength of the humans has at its bottom ever….

expressing love may have different ways… we don`t mind a lady expressing
her love by kissing her child at any place….. but be sure mind for a
couple expressing their feelings in public… no matter whatever the
way of ression may be…. we can not tolerate even a couple holding
their hands together and walking on a footh path…
you know why? because we are not having the strength even to look at
the TRUTH then accepting that truth out of question….

then what is the solution? people has to empower them selves and have
to be human.. you know we have seased to be humans any more….

i am what i am… so when i put my words… i don`t see any thing
except the TRUTH… spell mistakes are to be ignore… have a nice
day… regards..

yes friend u r absolutely right.

dear in India there is no rule no human right,no freedom,no body is caering only jangle raaj

THERE ARE MORE THINGS IN LIFE TO THINK INSPITE OF THIS BAKVAS, WHAT YOU THINK TALKING ABOUT THE TAKING GLASSES IN PUB, KISSING IN PUBLIC PLACES MAKING U SPECIAL OR IMPRESS S’ONE, NO DEAR THE COUNTRY NEEDS YOUR VALUEABLE VIEWS .

THANX

Hi,

Who the hell you are decide about Indian Mentality.. It is every ones personal view .. U can give your views and opinions but it doesn’t matter that everyone accept it.

We are Indians, Not Americans, Who do all this non sense stuff in public places.. If a person want to love his wife, he can do in his bedroom why on Railway station.

I dont wanna argue on this issue.

Regards,
Dinesh M. Ailani

Prerna
I am compelled to agree with what you have to say, but at the same time given our unwritten or for that matter unexplained societal norms I think a degree of restraint will not harm anybody. I am absolutely for what you have expressed but till the time mindsets change or people like us are able to do that, I feel restraint is better than being harassed by cops. Its your preogative to differ but I feel that at present thats the only solution as of now.
Suvra.

“your argument: kissing in public will ‘excite animal instincts’ of men.
my rebuttal: anywhere you go in india you will find the walls of dhabas and chai stands plastered with erotic bollywood posters.”

THis is also wrong.

“watching a bollywood movie is also a public affair.”

This is also wrong.

” bottom line, there is plenty of voluntary public consumption of soft-porn across india”

This is also wrong

“so i don’t think a loving kiss between two people is going to add much to the fray.
your argument: they can do whatever they want in private, but why must they do it in public?”

As all the first three items you listed contribute to making Delhi a rape capital of the world. Your last argument further contributes the same.

Criteria is that anything that’s addictive should be advertised to a bare min level as in society there are tough minded people and side by side emotional people unable to control their emotions and get trapped in to eddictive traits.

For example wine is not bad in its essence but if you visit rural India , millions of families are sufferimng due to drinking habbint of earning member of family. Please keep those weaker and vulnerable sections of society in mind before advocating something good for educated and richer class of society.
Sex is also addictive and hence its demonstration in open definitely causes problems.

Freedom for westernised Indians is agreeable. But You can not advise non westernised Indians to close their eyes if some kaale angrej in India strat perfroming sexual activities in wide opne like cats and dogs. Think about their freedom also please.

“my rebuttal: there are no parks or beaches or other such romantic places to enjoy love in private.”

Enjoy in your house so what? majority of Indians are not still westernsied. they do not want to see nakedness and sexual activitie being performed in opne like cats and dogs. majority of Indians still feel that they are vaaris of an 10,000 year old civilisation and have adopted certain values in this long course of time to alleviate the progeny above animal type behaviours. Why the westernised Indians forceing their besharmi on civilised people of India who prefer a disciplined sex life, disciplined eating habbits and disciplined drinking habbits.

“denying people the right to enjoy their love is a crime, in my opinion.” and biiger crime is to force majority of civilised Indians who do not want to watch humans behaving like cats and dogs perfroming sexual activities in opne.

Should we sacrifice the rights of Indian Indians for the lustful indisciplined vulgar activities of westernised Indians? I say NO.

@Ashu — i guess what i don’t understand is why public kissing offends people. would appreciate if you could explain.

prerna,
read some of the content and i really appreciate your thinking.my question to all is… what are we talking about? does a social group.. some individual or anybody for that matter have the right to decide when you are aloowed to FEEL…what is immoral about a hug or a kiss or holding hands. just because someone else can not does not mean i dont have the right to. i believe that each one of us have the right to love and to express it with a hug or kiss is but natural… thats freedom for me.
gautam

Prerna, I support the way you expressed your feeling in a cogent manner. You are very correct that there are shortage of spaces in our country where couples can enjoy their valuable close moments without hindrances. In our country we still consider sex as taboo, hence, the question of earmarking places for such couples is remote. In this matter we are lagging way behind of some of the countries as you hinted in your write up. This ensues crimes involving sex, unhealthy exposure of sex through pornography, unhealthy sex practices and so on.

@ Prerna – Yet again, the “India-basher” strikes!!! Prerna, on what basis do you say that so many people in Delhi are sexually repressed and thereby accord it a (self-made) title of “rape capital of the world”?!?! What makes you qualified to even make a statement like that, sitting 1,000s of miles away in the US of A!?!? Again, I repeat what I have been saying all along – Please stop taking unnecessary digs at India that are not true. If they are true and can be backed up by facts, no issues whatsoever. Another thing – What exactly do you mean when you say you don’t feel that sex should be kept private?!? Are you trying to say we should do it in public?!!? I hope not! And how can you even compare it to religion and worshipping God?!?! I think your “supposedly Stanford-educated mind” is beginning to deteriorate sharply, as your judgement is really pathetic. And one more thing, stop wasting your time on trying to have “A Day of Kissing in Public” or whatever, it will only create a nuisance value here and in many ways, the protests that I foresee will be widespread will eventually lead to us, the common citizens of India, suffering the most due to roadblocks, violence, etc. AN HONEST SUGGESTION – Prerna, just stop trying to waste time by making idiotic and unworkable suggestions from so far away – IF YOU REALLY ARE SO CONCERNED, COME TO INDIA AND DO SOMETHING INSTEAD! BUT I DOUBT IF U HAVE THE GUTS TO DO THAT!!!

@ Naddu – I can’t see from where the concept of arranged weddings even comes about and why on earth did you bother to mention it in your comment!!! Just because it may not work for you does not give you the right to speak for others!! I know several people who went for an arranged wedding and they are extremely happy in their lives today. You and I cannot judge for others whether it will work for them or not, so to each his/her own!!!

One last thing – my own view is that there is undoubtedly an element of hypocrisy in our country about such issues and I myself cringe when I hear our “leaders” (there has got to be another word, for they certainly don’t behave and act like leaders) talk such rubbish like they will oppose valentine’s day celebrations by attacking gift shops, etc. But honestly, our country is progressing, we are growing up as a nation, slowly but surely and like any democracy, there will be roadblocks along the way, but we are getting there! And as far as PDA is concerned, I myself have no problems with a couple kissing in public, but then they ought not to complain if they are being stared at by members of the public and become too conscious!

Dear Harit,

may I tell you something? I don´t have a little number of indian male friends. 2-3 of them recently (1-2 years ago) had this wonderful traditional thing of arranged wedding. I asked them if they are happy,they all tell me they have to adjust, they miss attraction, miss excitement and passion in their married life. I find them sitting in front of their computer trying to compensate their urge for passionate sex and adventure. They tell me they develope fantasies to sleep with another woman as they miss the physical and also emotional satisfaction in their married life.
Young couples are inhibited, as they firstly feel uneasy about sex, secondly, hardly gained any experience, they have either wrong ideas about it, nor do they really know how to practice. I have spoken with indians having been married for many years, they practice sex in the dark because they still feel ashamed to view the naked body of their spouse! The naked body of the partner you have lived with for so many years is an offence? It looks absurd in my eyes.
I understand that a kiss is associated with sex, how can you relate it to emotional affection when you don´t feel affected to your partner in a married life? The misinterpretation arises in this sense.

How does it happen?

Is it really so thrilling when you put 2 strangers together, when you decide about their future instead of leaving the choice to them? Why caring for love and emotions when the mainreason of wedding is a business deal among 2 families. A calculated marriage to keep the status, to increase wealth or to gain some beauty or any other advantage for a family? Is this the foundation of a married and a happy life of 2 people? Not the 2 people are the focus, they are put on the side line! This is pathetic!!!

Once a girl kisses a boy she´s emotionally attached, a kiss is an expression of an intense emotional attachment. I feel there is a relation and this is one reason why indians still try to ban affection and emotions, to keep their position by interference when it comes to a choice of their in the meantime grown up children
Love doesn´t grow, it deepens. Adjustment grows when there´s not given a better choice, but a great pressure and force!

Greetings,
Naddu

And Naddu, another thing – you say that “Adjustment grows when there´s not given a better choice, but a great pressure and force!” Well, I can assure you that even in a love marriage, adjustments have to be made!!! By its very design, whenever you love someone and marry that person (or get married the arranged way), both partners will have to adjust, as two people could be different in many ways, there could be many things that the girl or guy is used to and the other partner will need to accept that, I mean I could give any number of examples. Even in a love marriage where you know the person beforehand, there will STILL be adjustments to be made. I mean, after all, the spouse is himself/herself a separate individual with certain views, hopes, aspirations in life and is used to certain ways of living, etc. All this requires adjustments. So let’s stop kidding ourselves that you only have to make adjustments in a “loveless arranged marriage” – the most loving love marriage also requires adjusting to some extent!

And what is this? A Day of kissing in public. Explain what you people want to achieve by doing this. Everything needs to have an objective isn’t it? If there is a point to be proven, then atleast have a ‘point’

And then let me make a suggestion, if you really have an objective that you want to achieve then try having a ‘Day of sex in Public’. Whatever idiotic goals that you have, may be achieved even faster, when you make this quantum leap from no PDA to Sex…That will create a shock and not a ripple that a “Day if kisses in public” will create. Think big guys

DEAR HARIT SHAH,
You want figures. Well according to Delhi Police’s report a woman is raped every 24 hours in Delhi. About 50% of these cases go unreported because of the opprobrium attached to the act. So most delhi girls who get raped remain silent. Satisfied with numbers Mr Shah. Or do u want more numbers.
As far as ur dig that Prerna can do anything for India by only coming to India has no substance. In the past 15 years the NRIs have done the greatest good for India by sending remittances in dollars. This has swelled the forex reserves of India. And assured its import requirements for the future.
Also that Prerna is mostly successful in identifying the problems that people of middle class India actually face. So it doesn’t matter whether she lives in America or Bihar. u live in India. Still u dont know that delhi is the rape capital of India.
On arranged marriage. I think arranged marriage is the most reckless and biggest risk that a person takes. More so for a woman. It means that u r taking the risk of spending ur whole life with somebody whom u dont know. Any sensible person will never take such a risk. The fact that a few arranged marriages work out doesn’t eliminate the huge element of risk and recklessness involved in it.Take care.love ankur.

@ Ankur – I’m sure we’ve got better things to do than “joining hands with you in kissing at Khan markets”. Seriously man, let’s just move on in life! Do whatever it is u want to do, whether PDA or anything else. Its ok, really!

@ Ankur – Please note, I am NOT taking a dig at Prerna. I’m giving my honest views about what I feel are her biased views about India, so there’s no need to get so hyper! And I’m sure “middle class India” knows what its problems are and can very well solve them. And regards your views on arranged marriages, well, they are YOUR views and you CANNOT impose them on anyone. Not everyone thinks like you – live with it!

@Naddu

A kiss is a sweet message of love: Wonderfully said. I agree 200% with you. We kiss kids, mum, get kisses from dad and definitely a kiss from a girl(lady) is always welcomed. They all are different and have different intention.

A kiss has no relation with SEX until it is passionate between two partner for the intention of making love.

Also I agree 200% with than frequent kisses is a stamp of trust. But one slight problem here: Most western world(including Australia) freedom of choosing partner and love is there:

Naddu has proven her IQ is 210. Well done.

(I owe you a kiss)

Dear Harit Shah

India is progressing exponential but social values are going down the gutter at same rate.

I love India’s progress but social downgrade is too fast.

PLEASE PROVE ME WRONG.

Ankur

GO BACK TO INDIA AND DO SO SOMETHING FOR SOCIETY

I absolutely agree with your thoughts. There is lot of hypocrisy in our society especially too many rules for women and men can get away with murder.Its high time that younger generation take the responsbility to change the mentality and backward culture of our society. If public display of affection is not the part of culture then rape, domestic violence and other crimes against women are also not the part of Indian Culture, in olden days women were considered to be “DEVI”

“STOP THE DISPLAY OF DOUBLE STANDARD”

@ Ashu,

I haven´t claimed a kiss is not related to sex, the subject “public display of affection” is the discussed subject. I believe you haven´t understood the word affection.
I will try to define AFFECTION: A FEELING OF FONDNESS OR LIKING, THE ACTION OR PROCESS OF AFFECTING OR BEING AFFECTED, A MENTAL STATE OR EMOTION.
Have I misunderstood the subject or have you?
A kiss or a touch in public is not related to sex, when you see couples passing by, kissing during a sunset or holding hands, that´s not sex, when you interpret it this way you seem to have a repressed desire, a great fantasy, or a wrong impression about sex and emotions.
Testosterone is a hormone you find in a male and a female body, I´m sure you know this already. You know what helps to ease up a body when you don´t get sex?
I suggest you to do some sports to gain a relief, it´ll help physically and mentally.
You focus too much on sexual issues dearest. You fail to understand that there are other ways to connect between different gender which are also pleasant but don´t lead to intercourse!

Kissing or hugging couples are a normality here, I don´t really miss nor would I see anything disturbing in it.

Do you find it sexy when Angela Merkel kisses Nicolas Sarkozy in public? It looks very cute! ha ha

You don´t need to worry, I kiss the man of my choice, one at a time! ))))))))))

Greetings,
Naddu

Dear Prerna,

thank you for your efforts. I hope humanity will succeed!

The pleasure is all mine,
Naddu

Wow ….I agree

Dear Prerna,
Leave alone the kissing I would subscrbe my view even public fucking is not matter when the companion agrees. I never derived any pleasure in kissing on the open parts ( except the private parts)
I fully endorse your view
regards.
SS nathan

hi,

Prerna i like your story…….

br
Manoj

DEAR PRERNA
YOU ASK THE QUESTION IS RIGHT.IF PEOPLE SEE THE SEXY FILM,SEXY EMAIL.SEXY PHOTO PERSON GET AUTOMATIC SEXY.SEXY CANNOT BE CANTROL.BECAUSE WHEN LADY WEAR SAREES,MINI SCAT.THE SHOW THERE
CHEATH THEY DO MAKE IF MAN SEE SEXY WILL COMESEXY IS LOVE.LOVE IS SEXY,GIVE ME THE REPLY I AM WAIT FOR IT
YOUR SINERILY
HARI

i fully agree with your ideas

Dear Prerna

Kissing is no obscene, but not is public place,

This act may attract others to follow but HOW, will every one will have their facny or wife or a prostitute or any other person who will allow and get pleased to take it,

hence it is advised to prevent, but cannot be prohibited,

What is needed is the SENSE

OK

i just want to ask you one question ……what can say about the type affection youth is showing now a days in the public places eg.college campus ….

Absolutely right. In these days, there r so many moral guard r roaming in street 2 create a scene. They r simply interested 2 be in news.
thnx n rgds,
mks

YOU R RIGHT

Hi Prerna,

Your blog is too good.Keep it up and keep on writing.

Bye
Tc

enjoy kissing, please dont stop.

Prena
you are right i agree with You
Pratik

Dear Prerna,
We have to revive our cultural traditions of living.The inhabitants
in this part of the continent were followers of particular traditions.
Which are followed still in all the states.Only the language of these
traditions was kept away from the citizen.We worshiped NATURE.
The meaning of Satyameva Jayate,has to be made known to all.So we
have to revive the language of the words,SATYAMEVA JAYATE.
With best regards,
Shyam(Damodar)V.Bale.

Dear Prerana

I read the containtes of u r paragragh and I realy agree to it.
if u do not allow the freedpm and pressurerise do or do not do this and that then the hidden things burst out.
The sexual crime comes out if the desire does not meet its expectations and satisfied the one and cool down.

The free atmospehere with limitation is always healthy.if the you see the sucessesfull
people`s biography in their parsonel life,they all have good free love and satisfaction .

Then only they reach to the top. at the same time one should not force and do the injustice with our sexual partner but must respect her.

The sexual posters in the dhabas and lavatory exposes the hidden feeling of the the people who are not getting chance to complete their desire.

I shilpa shetty`s embracing situation where she was not able to oppose to richird due to the
fame and repuatation of Richared Gare in hi fi function.

The media and our police laws and culture needs to be changed and updated as per the time.
the romantic situation and the atmospehere should allow to kiss in open like sea beach,
garden or loveble natural spots .

ramesh

@ Naddu

Here are two statements that you wrote
“Public display of affection, is an expression of affection and care, an emotional matter, has nothing to do with sex! Mothers kiss their children because they feel a pure love and care for them, it´creates a happiness when they kiss each other ”
AND
“I haven´t claimed a kiss is not related to sex, the subject “public display of affection” is the discussed subject.”

Your two statements are at odd with each other. One says PDA in public has nothing to do with Sex and then go on describing kiss of mother to kid etc, other says, you don’t claim so. Read my earlier advice – Be consistent. This is another example of contradiction in your statements.

Next thing about defining affection: Did I at anytime say, that affection is not what you describe? Or any statement to contrary? I don’t think so. So don’t waste your time on this definition. I am not in disagreement here. And you brought up the whole affection and kissing not related to sex topic (Check your posts)

Bottomline: I agree with you, one of us don’t understand the subject. And that person is you

About “A kiss or a touch in public is not related to sex, when you see couples passing by, kissing during a sunset or holding hands, that´s not sex, when you interpret it this way you seem to have a repressed desire, a great fantasy, or a wrong impression about sex and emotions.”
Who says so? Dr Naddu? Well like I said, test it out. Try kissing/smooching your female and male friends on a pass, while holding hands during sunset. If it doesn’t have to do with Sex and only care and affection, then your act should be perfectly acceptable to yourself, them. However, let me tell you most probable scenarios
With female friends: A slap OR a relationship
With male friends: A strange look and you will be branded gay OR you male friends will come out of their closets )
And That’s why kissing between unrelated people is about Sex. Be it public o private place. Hope you get it this time. I am getting tired of explaining

Your statement “Testosterone is a hormone you find in a male and a female body, I´m sure you know this already. You know what helps to ease up a body when you don´t get sex? I suggest you to do some sports to gain a relief, it´ll help physically and mentally. You focus too much on sexual issues dearest. You fail to understand that there are other ways to connect between different gender which are also pleasant but don´t lead to intercourse! “ – I agree with what you are saying. Did I say anything to contrary? Question at the end of above is, So what? How does it relate to the topic. Stop making random statements that don’t have anything to do with the topic. Topic is “ PDA being acceptable in Public place” …Naddu Naddu…What should I do with you? You digress so much

“Do you find it sexy when Angela Merkel kisses Nicolas Sarkozy in public? It looks very cute! ha ha” – No I don’t and probably most of the Europeans don’t. However, that’s not the topic. Topic is that it is not seen that way in India. Like I mentioned in earlier post. Don’t try putting your standards (European) on Indian public. Like I had put I back to you, you are no different yourself when faced with a more extreme situation like “Extreme PDA – Sex in public place”

@ Naddu – thanks 4 the advice, dear! I did exactly that – kissed my wife, and that too it was PDA – PRIVATE DISPLAY OF AFFECTION – done in the privacy of our bedroom! Not a tamasha 4 others to watch! I wonder what ur husband will think if he reads ur comment that u kiss the men of your choice, one by one! Hehe! Couldn’t resist taking a crack at that one! Take it in good spirit, Naddu, just joking!
@ Aussie – I’d be interested to know on what basis you said that social values r going down the gutter in India. Yes, joint families are slowly breaking down, as people are getting more independent and less tolerant with economic liberalisation. Naddu rightfully pointed out that women are becoming more independent, free and ambitious and this is another (positive) change coming about. But we care for our families, unlike in many other countries, we do not leave our elders in old age homes, we are responsible enough to take care of them and more importantly, even as we are becoming more independent, the attachment to family remains very much an integral part of our lives. I can give you ANY number of examples, Aussie, but it would take up a whole page and more if I did! Thus, your comments about social values going down the gutter are totally baseless and without an iota of truth in them!

@ Ashu,

I clearly answer to your 2 closeminded questions.

1. NOT ONLY
2. YES

Ashu, no I don´t smooch all my male friends because I have been married for 20 years. I´ve been smooching one and the same althrough the years, and guess what, not every smooch ended in sex. Sexual attraction hasn´t only be the reason for our smooches.
Before I met my husband, I had a great time and smooched a few boys of my choice. One at a time! I welcome the fact that I could gain experiences before marriage, hence I didn´t feel the need to experiment later, the feeling to make up anything I could have missed didn´t occur.

I regret you are unable to understand the difference between luck and love of caring and a sexual attraction. May be you haven´t ever experienced this difference. I know what I´m talking about.
I hope your parents love you enough and express it also physically, that you will be able to transport this feeling to your girl, this feeling that leads to confidence and emotional security.
Free yourself from the thought that interaction between a man and a woman is ONLY sex related. I don´t mind to hug a male friend of mine and kiss his face. It´s even common among friends in Europe, nobody would start having an idea that the people of opposite genders, hugging and kissing each other have a sexual affair!!!

I use to take my 17 year old daughter to her friends place at the weekend. I drop her at a meeting point, every time when she arrives or when I pick her up, 5-6 boys welcome her with a hug.
I´m witness of the ceremony of this greeting and bye, see how uncomplicated these matters can be. If I would want to, I could make a drama of it, would I be a moralist I could spoil the entire matter. I believe it´s better to observe and keep things under control, I support my daughter in her natural behaviour and development. I absolutely know, would I ask her why she hugs or kisses her friends in public, she would ask me Mama, is all well? this is common! Would I forbid, she would even feel more tempted. I also discuss sexual matters with her, becaues I don´t insist to become a young grandma. I know how things are, I was myself a teenager.

@HARIT
what do you know about care for parents in western world???
The entire social structure is different. We don´t leave the challenge to care for elder to their children or a few family members. There´s a social responsibility of all people in country to care for elder or disadvantaged humans. Everyone in our country has a pension plan by a law called SOCIAL LAW. It´s an institution which was introduced in 1889 in Germany. Wow… I don´t think we were socially corrupt that time, obviously we were socially very much ahead in ancient times -this law and responsibility is still valid.
What do childless couples do in India?
And tell me one thing, how would you practice to personally care for your mom and dad all day long when you yourself have a family life, your professional responsibilities…do you give up your job and care for your parents, or do you leave it to the women in the house???
When take all the responsibility yourself, I admire you absolutely, I hope you manage your life still financially. I do also hope that your parents don´t feel they are a burden for you.

The joint family model in India will also reduce due to the economic progress. The economy factor has been responsible for this concept. Economic reasons cause that people stay or stand together, that´s not a secret. When each member in a family is financially strong enough to have an own life, he/she would always try to live it, that´s the way it is.
It´s a dream of every individual and free human to build a house and a family.
There´s even a proverb that says:
“A man should achieve 3 things in life”:
Planting a tree,
building a house,
having a son.
I believe, the social change is just a matter of time, wait and see.
Ask women with professional qualifications if they are willing to give up their professional life and ambitions to care for their parents. I know they will all try to give their best and would manage to do both even, but it will cause tension.
There are enough women who look after their parents in need of care, believe me, it´s a tightrope walk, tough and exhausting. Sometimes it´s even better when you involve a professional help, for example when parents suffer from any disease, many old people suffer from anything.

When you claim WE CARE; WHY don´t you SAY WOMEN CARE???
In most of the cases WOMEN do this CARE!!!

Greetings,
Naddu

@ NADDU

Looks like you’ve got some sort of COMPLEX here – when I said “WE CARE” I was NEVER referring to any gender, so please stop making incorrect accusations here. And as regards your comment about my knowledge about parental care in the western world, fair enough, maybe it is unfair to generalise – but then I can also accuse you of generalising on so many things that we have discussed in earlier comments. I have a number of friends and relatives in the US and have some idea about the country. As regards taking responsibility to care for my parents, when I say that, I DO NOT MEAN that I need to be with them whole day – they are not immobile or do not have some mental problem or are not suffering from any debilitating and life-threatening disease that they need to be cared for 24 hours a day!!! And by the way, its all about finding time and allocating it properly – if there is a will, there is a way, as simple as that! And don’t worry, my parents will never feel they are a burden on me. Everyone cares, not just me – my wife, brother, his wife.etc. And I can’t see how the issue of childless couples is even relevant here!! Obviously, things would be different for them, or maybe they adopt. I have said that the joint family system is becoming rarer here due to economic liberalisation and in any case, I know a number of people and friends who do not stay with their parents even in India. You are right, even I expect this trend to continue with the increasing prominence of nuclear families. Now, whether this is bad or good is open to debate and I have my views on it, but maybe that can be left for another time…

And as far as your comments about “There´s a social responsibility of all people in country to care for elder or disadvantaged humans.” – I would presume you are talking about social security?!? Correct me if I am wrong. Anyways, whatever be the case, it seems to me that you are attempting to abdicate your responsibility by making this statement and transferring the responsibility to “all people in the country”!!! If you would simply say that “this is common” where you live that children separate from their parents later in life and stay independently and meet their parents once in a while, I can understand that! It seems that you people are too “independent-minded” to bother to find the time to look after your parents and just leave that responsibility to “all people in your country”!!!

You do NOT have to give up your professional life and ambitions to look after your parents. Yes, undoubtedly it may not be so easy, but then in this case, I’ll have to say to each his/her own. It is not worth discussing any more on this, as different people have different priorities and inclinations and it may not be possible for everyone to handle both profession and family life, that too not just husband/wife/children/friends but also parents. So to each his/her own.

Where are all the women in this girl talk???

@Naddu
Dear Naddu,
I must appreciate your precise way of thinking process, topic here which is being discussed is:
PDA-Public Display of Affection
and you are precisely discussing that with Harit
PDA-Parental Display of Affection
and somebody is saying that your IQ must be 210, may be, but IQ of that person saying so is surely below 40.
name of that culprit who is saying that IQ of Naddu is 210 is aussie.
Thank you,
Rahul

@Ashu,

PDA only offends intolerant people not open minded people. That´s what I think about it.
This is not a debate where you win a prize by making your comments, hence there aren´t losers or winners. If you think you are a winner, I congratulate you.
Our thinking processes vary in subtle ways, and I´m happy about it.
Would it be different, we all had a poorer life. Exchange of thoughts, debates are useful for a better understanding. We all have our pros and contras to justify our lives, may the be useful, rational or irrational. The perspective and relations matter.

@Rahul,
when I respond to another personal comment you don´t need to read it, just gloss over the next one

The discussed subject isn´t me, it is PDA

Thank you for your care,
Naddu

@ Ashu

PDA only offends intolerant people not open minded people????????? Aaahhhh…Can’t believe that you are again generalising and judging and branding people negatively (intolerant), who behave differently than yourself.

See the humour, when I said ‘debate won’

gloss over and read the next one* (hotfoot)

touche’
)

Nope. I liked your comeback

Is that confused? I don’ think so

Ashu, do you believe I would give up so easily, you don´t seem to know me! Drat!

@Ashu,

ever visited the Temples of Khajuraho? I would recommend them to you
Inspiring erotic architecture, 11th Century!
We just give PDA a new meaning –
Public Display of Architecture!

Good day to you, I´m on duty
Naddu

TO ASHU ,THE MASTER OF CRAP,
man u r really the master of bullshiting. What crap do u write. Boss even if PDA is related to sex, so what’s wrong in that. Do u think if something is associated with sex then it is wrong. Then u and me are also associated with sex. We both came out of sex of our parents. The Indian public is definitely wrong when it doesn’t accept PDA.
Dont hide beehind logic. See the truh. A public kiss in offices and other formal forums also acts as a great stress-buster.
Also we r not talking here about the kisses that mothers take of their kids. We r talking about real kisses between male and female .With lots of sx involved in it.
U SHOULD ALSO APPRECIATE NADDU FOR ALL THE DIVERSE INFORMATION AND RICHNESS THAT SHE ADDS ON THIS BLOG. so get out of ur ego and start seeing things in their true light.take care.love ankur.

@Naddu
Thanks for your valuable suggestion.
Next time I will gloss over the next one, just by reading your name Naddu.
Because to verify whether it’s another personal comment which I don’t need to read it……….i HAVE to read it, apply some logic.
By the way I was talking about discussed subject that’s PDA….not YOU.
Thanks and take care
Rahul

Ankur…You seem to be pretty frustrated. Cool down, else you may blow ur tiny brains, which says “Don’t hide behind logic”: – )))))). People hide behind logic is a new joke that I have heard today. Thanks for making me laugh

Don’t blurt before understanding the issue. Read the posts that I have exchanged with Naddu. And you will know why we were discussing PDA being related to sex. If you don’t want to do that, then I don’t have time to waste on ur frustration and explain everything all over again.

If PDA is related to sex (Which you are fine with), then don’t have sexual activity in public. Do you kisses and get all its benefits, where nobody is embarrassed /uncomfortable /offended by your act. Is that so hard to comprehend? Maybe to you it is.

Ego. There is a fine line between ego and confidence. For an under confident person, I can be an egoist, as gap is too much to comprehend. To a confident person, I am just being confident. You can decide, who you are of the two….: – ))))))

@Naddu

old architect are as important as ecology. Our history is there,our old ways of life and how civilisations eveolved is there. I even spent a week in Mexico and visited Mayan’s ruins. Amazing to see a mix of 13th century and religion and cultures.

@Ankur

Respect is earned not learnt and Gandhi Jee earned it hard way.

WHO DO YOU RESPECT?.

@Naddu

I admire your vision, I never have been to Kajuraho but heard a lots good thing about it.

YOU ARE BRILIANT.

Dear Ankur honey,

please calm down. I´m sorry, I missed to update the proverb in respect of equality of both genders.

Thank you for being so mindful, another cheers for your support. You are a gentleman!

A man should achieve 5 things in life:

- respect towards all women
- 1 son and 1 daughter
- time for work and play with wife and children/housework and cookings included
- a sense for romance and skills to make a woman physically happy
- the ability to discuss with a woman + the ability to read between the lines not –
only between legs

My head is mine Ankur!

With luv,
Naddu

@Harit,

divorce rate in India doesn´t increase because of western influence. The reason of increasing divorces grows proportionally with education of women and the rise of their independence.
Women finally have the possibility to free themselves from their emotionless married lives.
A man would not end a marriage, women are more bold, if you want to hear it or not!

Naddu

By the way, I support India´s progress with my tax, Germany still pays 64 million Euros development aid per anno.

I benefit disadvantaged children there. I have visited the Subcontinent for many times @ Harish. How often have you been to America or Europe? May I know? What do you do for your country?

I love India
Naddu

Japan did same:Printed and printed more money in 1991 to 1995 to getout of recession.

IT NEVER WORKED.

@ Naddu

I agree that the living standards, educational infrastructure, hard and soft infrastructure, the strength of a country’s institutions etc are what defines a country’s “wealth”. Our institutions are creaky, but we are somehow creaking along as a democracy but India still works! In spite of all the colossal problems that we face, problems that most other countries across the world would never even dream of being able to cope with, we are still progressing. Our problems are very complex and while the government is doing a lot, it still needs to do a lot more, I would be the first to agree with that. But the bottomline is, depsite whatever problems and roadblocks we face, we are progressing!!!!

You are the first to defend whatever the west stands for, isn’t it, even if it is wrong?!?!?! You guys are honestly shameless, the way your “so-called institutions” like Lehman Brothers, AIG, etc collapsed!!! THAT HASN’T HAPPENED IN INDIA, NONE OF OUR BANKS HAS FAILED OR COLLAPSED AND OUR COUNTRY IS WITHSTANDING THIS GLOBAL TURMOIL VERY WELL!!! Your country’s greed and unsustainable ways of living on credit was always going to come home to roost one day and see the consequences!?!??! Bail out after bail out, tax payer money going waste, people losing jobs and their entire savings – WHERE ARE YOUR SO-CALLED INSTITUTIONS?!!??! This goes for you too, ANKUR – you kept commenting about the great civilisation, etc – well, I don’t see anything great in the way your economy is on the brink!!! And by the way, on what basis are you saying India is in bigger shit than the US!!?!? We are in a much healthier position, yes we have our own issues, but nothing like what the US and Europe (particularly the UK) are facing.

Naddu, I never said diveroce rate is rising becoz of “western influences” – it has all to do with economic liberalisation, so stop misunderstanding my comments!! And while I agree that more opportunities for women do give them greater choices, including the choice of not getting married or doing so late, I can’t see why you say “Women finally have the possibility to free themselves from their emotionless married lives. A man would not end a marriage, women are more bold, if you want to hear it or not!” A marriage is emotionless ONLY if the partners make a wrong decision to marry someone they may not be compatible with!!! That means it is the fault of BOTH – man AND woman!!! So STOP being such a blatant feminist and look at things more objectively, it will be much appreciated, Naddu! As reagrds whether who ends a marriage, again as usual you are GENERALISING – what gives you the authority to even make a statement like that!?!?! Again, I say stop generalising and making such statements.

Naddu, I don’t feel the need to justify to YOU what I do for my country, but nonetheless, if you are so interested, I also help disadvantaged children, I have “adopted” an underprivileged child for whom I pay her school fees and keep track of her progress to ensure she gets a good education, which her parents are too poor to afford. I also pay my taxes and I pay quite a hefty tax annually…really, maybe we should stop getting so personal here and stick to the discussion at hand. Amazing, we start with PDA and move on to such diverse subjects – it is a good thing!

And to end – I hope and pray that the US gets out of the hole it has dug for itself. It will indirectly affect me as well, and I would say all of us in different ways, direct or indirect. Hope we get out of this global slowdown soon enough.

Dear Harit,

I´m not an American, Germany isn´t responsible for the globale crisis. But we are a responsible that for a part of the progress in YOUR country. Without the peaceful German Union the openening of the border, the access to markets to the East had never happened. The fall of the wall was the start of a better life for many people in the EAST and the whole world. I´m proud of this great achievement of our politicians in this matter.
You shouldn´t blame innocent people for perverse behaviour of greedy managers and bankers, or grasshoppers that are thirsting for quick profits without thinking of the effects for the involved people, without having a moral or ethical behaviour. Stop to generalize by blaming a part of the world for failures and greed of a few!!! This is pure generilisation!!!
You don´t seem to know anything about European Culture and its achievements. Europe was a battlefield 60 years ago and look how peacefully and good people live together, what people have gained.
Your reproach misses qualification here.
People who lose their jobs here gain from the welfare state, it ´s again different from the system in the US. In my country all people gain from a shared risk pool financed by tax.

I´m not a feminist but a woman with a heart, mind and emotions. When I call a marriage emotionless I do it with qualification, because 80 per cent of my indian friends are unhappy in their married life.
I can sense how it feels.

IT IS A SHAME WHEN YOU DENY PEOPLE THE RIGHT TO BEHAVE LIKE A HUMAN, WHEN YOU FORCE THEM TO IGNORE FEELINGS AND EMOTIONS.
THIS IS ANIMAL AND HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH HUMANITY AND A HAPPY LIFE!
HOW CAN ANYONE FEEL OFFENDED BY VIEWING PEOPLE BEING IN LOVE; KISSING AND CARESSING IN THE PUBLIC???
IN MY EYES PEOPLE ARE EMOTIONALLY MALADJUSTED WHEN THEY HAVE A PROBLEM WITH IT.
THIS IS REAL POVERTY, EMOTIONAL POVERTY!

*no offence, that´s my sincere view*

I appreciate your personal dedication to help disadvantaged children and would hope that more people follow your good example.
Thank you for your justification Harit.
I understand you are a patriot.
I´m also one.

HUMILIATION AND MENTAL OPPRESSION BY IGNORANT AND SELFISH TEACHERS WREAK HAVOC IN THE YOUTHFUL MIND THAT CAN NEVER BE UNDONE AND OFTEN EXERT A BALEFUL INFLUENCE IN LATER LIFE.

Naddu

@ NADDU

I NEVER said Germany was responsible for the current global crisis and I NEVER “blamed innocent people for perverse behaviour of greedy managers and bankers, or grasshoppers that are thirsting for quick profits without thinking of the effects for the involved people, without having a moral or ethical behaviour”. The truth is that it is indeed the US that is mostly responsible for what we are seeing today – the greed of those hedge fund managers, of bankers, investment banks, etc tha has led to this rot in the system. And to a large extent US consumers are also responsible – by living a highly extravagant lifestyle through having everything on credit, they were setting themselves up for this!! It is just unsustainable!!! It is like a shopkeeper (China, in this case, by and large) sells his goods to a consumer (in this case, the US) by giving the consumer his own money to buy his own goods!!! By buying hundreds of billions of US $ in treasury bills (739.6 billion $ as mentioned by you, Naddu), they effectively financed the US to enbale their consumers to buy Chinese goods! That is why they are so dependent on the US! It is in their interests to ensure that nothing happens to that country, or else!

To be brutally honest, in truth, we are ALL responsible to some extent – bankers, lenders who gave money to “sub-prime” customers, borrowers who kept flipping houses to the next “fool” in line at a higher price, the credit rating agencies for certifying such junk bonds as “investment grade” (it is apparent that they themselves are not “investment grade”! I find it amazing and shocking that we STILL take the views of S&P, Moody’s etc seriously!!! ), the regulators for sleeping at the wheel and not keeping such greedy practices in check, people like Gordon Brown, who now asks for the Swiss Banks to remove their secrecy laws (where the hell was he when the whole world was enjoying the huge asset bubbles being built up and everyone was enjoying their notional wealth created through property price appreciation and stock price appreciation?!?!?! How come at THAT time he did not ask the Swiss to knock off their banking serecy laws and bring the tax havens across the world to book??!?!) and finally, US – OURSELVES – for “going with the flow” and getting more and more greedy!!!

Like I have mentioned before, I personally have no problems if people show affection and hug and kiss in “public”, but there has to be a line drawn somewhere. That “line” differs from country to country – in many countries, such things are forbidden and you will be put into prison/fined, etc, whereas in other countries, people don’t give a damn. I personally feel kissing/smooching in public is acceptable and people ought not to be made to feel guilty for doing it by being arrested or whatever, but going beyond that would be crossing the limits. Anything more ought to be reserved for the bedroom. And if people do choose to smooch in public, if their affections for each other come to the fore and they choose to display their deep love for each other in full public view, then they ought not to complain if they are being stared at by members of the public. While I myself have no problems if a couple gets cozy next to me, I myself would prefer to reserve it for the bedroom.

My oh my ASHU,

when do you finally comprehend that exchange of endearments is not SEX!
Everybody should have at least the choice to do this in the public !!!
We don´t discuss having sexual intercourse on the streets, you make a sexual act of a kiss!!!

Come over to Germany and show me streets and places where people copulate…I have never seen them!!! I´ve been living here for 42 years.
Proof what you claim!!!!

Naddu

@ Naddu

Now you are throwing in another term (Exchange of Endearment), which will only confuse the issue. Exchange of endearment is not equal to PDA. I hope you can comprehend that. So, don’t use “Exchange of endearment” as a term and confuse the issue more. In India Endearment display is a “Yes”, Some forms of PDA is a “Not acceptable”, specially where there is sexual connotation.

I would like all forms of PDA to be acceptable, but I can see why it is not and thus am tolerant to that perspective. Problem is that your and Prerna’s understanding of another society and tolerance towards a different perspective is very low. You are just closing yourself to another point of view, and how most people in India feel. You just want your levels/standards/feeling to be adopted by all. Very self righteous and holier than thou approach.

As far a copulating on streets on Germany is concerned. You are not reading carefully. Please pay attention. I didn’t say that it happens. Infact I said it mostly doesn’t happen – so I don’t need to prove anything. Did I not point out your and German and American intolerance to it? And this is because that degree of sexual act is “NOT ACCEPTABLE” in Germany. Which means German society is also intolerant to that degree of sexual act. Indian society is not tolerant to a lower degree of sexual act, like smooching etc.

So, if the two society’s (Western and Indian) response is the same to something like this (The difference is the degree of act and not the act itself), then the question is why do you want to force your degree of acceptability / tolerance down the throat of a society which is not ready for it? It just shows your intolerance. Specially when you scoff at a higher degree of same act yourself and feel that it is right. If you and western society would have said that “We are ok with people copulating on street”, then we would have said that this is an absolute difference of perspective and then there is a point on debating. Now I don’t see much difference in perspective, just that acceptability standards are at different levels and one set of people forcing their standards on others (Read yourself, Ankur and Prerna)

Hope you get it this time

Dear Rahul,

first of all, a single action of a guest won´t cause a change in a country. A demonstration in public makes only sense when a greater number of people with the same goal take part in it.
I would have to drag my husband to India for this mission. He never joined me till now, he feels India is too crowded. My indian lawyer friend offered already to commit the “crime” with me. Other friends of mind offered the same. So… incase the action happens I may have to consider what to do, whom to kiss. (joke apart, I would come, I don´t have to lose a reputation in India, when they blame me, I will be blamed as a guest and will leave again…I hope I don´t lose the right to visit India as a tourist)

I have gained the experience how it feels when indian people stare at you. I travelled alone within India, at times I was accompanied by indian friends. I was scared to walk alone on Delhi roads, I hardly saw women on the streets but many man with staring eyes although I kept a decent dresscode according to local moral standards.

A single action won´t have an effect, but if people find it due and want to reach this goal, they should actively work for it. A demonstration held by many couples might cause a different scene.
It would be good to figure out voices or thoughts of young people before organising a stunt.
The more people join in, the more successful it may become. When 50 couples do the same thing at the same time, people don´t know where to stare at first. Police would also not know where to start first. And who would dare to hinder a big group doing what they are doing? Do you really believe an observing crowd would become violent by viewing people hugging and giving pecks to each other?
I would involve journalists and lawyers to observe reactions and intervene appropriately.

Rahul, may I ask you something? Would you welcome PDA for yourself for people in your India?
I have asked so many of my friends, they would wish it but don´t have the courage to express it being scared of the reactions of other people.

Thank you for your pointing out the scruples.
Naddu
Naddu

TO HARIT SHAH AND ASHU, LOTS OF KUD-KUD,
The per capita income of US is today also much higher than India.India has the highest no of people living under the poverty line today. While for US this is negligible even today. Had the Americans not lived beyond their means on credit, developing countries like India and China wouldn’t have experienced such a boom. It was to satiate the huge demand of American consumers that India showed enormous export growth. Thus millions of Indians were lifted from below the poverty line. The present economic crisis is because of foolish financial innovation of Wall-Street and the tendency of non-saving of US consumers.
Indian banks didn’t fail but at what cost. Only 40% of Indians have bank accounts. The government is not giving Indian banks the latitude to act. So the question of their failing doesn’t arise. Still i would concede that the Indian banks are in a healthy position when compared to their Icelandic counterparts.
Harit only a rich country can have a rich culture. Actually culture is a function of prosperity. India is the poorest country in the world. So there is no question of it having a rich culture. Though pockets of India like Gujrat and Rajasthan do have a rich culture.
Ashu i would advise u to read my earlier comment to Harit. Ur concept about the economic crisis will clear. And only Iran traded its oil in Euro. Because it wanted to challenge the hegemony of dollar. Actually presently the Euro has depreciated much more than the dollar. It is worth much less than the dollar. Go and check it. Countries that had reserves of Euro have lost much more.
And Harit i m an Indian. And i dont pay taxes because i dont earn that much. take care .love kudkud

Dear Rahul,

you are just one voice in a billion, never forget.
When you think all is good as it is in your country, I wonder what you are doing here.
Why are you interested in controversial discusssions when you have made all your decisions for yourself and obviously for many in your country?

I regret, that India hasn´t yet managed to care for security of their inhabitants. When a mob is able to insult people when the do harmless things I ask myself what´s going on in your country.
May be you have adjusted to that circumstance already and believe it´s a normality.
Then you should close your door, close your eyes….and dream of a better world…with tolerant people.

Obviously it´s not necessary to talk about emotional matters when a person kills another one for an i-pod on indian roads. When a different thought causes harasment and emotional outbursts like I face them here.

When I come to India I don´t need your order. I´m welcomed by my friends and know how to behave.
I wonder why you feel threatened?
Why should I go to a place as such? There are better places where I can move around without being scared of crime and murder.
How the police was able to control a few I came to know when the terrorism attack happened in Mumbai. It was a total disaster.
A great life you have… living in fear of a mob!!!!

Enjoy your life, don´t forget to close the door tonite.

Naddu

@Naddu
Dear Naddu
First decide which is YOUR country, then we will discuss rest of the things.
If india is not YOUR country then don’t take tension about people of india and don’t try to enforce your ideas of PDA on us.
and fear is in YOUR mind not in my mind, that’s why you are expecting protection from journalists and lawyers before your possible PDA demonstration in india.
i am indeed enjoying my life in india as a indian citizen rather than become a second class citizen of some other country.
regarding terrorism i won’t discuss it with you, because this is not the topic here, and yes like you have not forgot terror attack in Mumbai, we have also still remember 9/11 of U.S.A.
So, dear terrorism is altogether different subject. please don’t mix it with trivial PDA.
Thanks and take care
Rahul

@RAHUL

I am delighted to meet some who is proud to be Indian. Great. But what about north Indian treated as second rated citizen in Maharastra and bashed to death while being watched by media and police or Bihari’s treatment in Delhi and North Indian’s in Tamil Nadu or Tamil in North India.

“CLEAN YOUR OWN HOUSE FIRST BUDDY. STOP TALKING BIG AS “SECOND RATED CITIZEN”.

IF YOU CANT COMPLETE DON”T BLAME AS SECOND RATED CITIZENSHIP AS EXCUSE.(LIVING IN SO CALLED COMFORT ZONE IS EASY PATH MOST PEOPLE CHOOSE)

Ankur

Read the posts carefully. Because if you do, then you would realise that I am not contesting that US in material terms is richer than India. You are wasting your time, trying to prove it to me. Misdirected comments.
On the Indian banks being healthier than US. Good that you accept that it is the case, and that’s the bottom-line. Now you can justify why, with thousand different reasons. Statement that Indian banks are healthier still hold good. Anyway, that’s not my point of debate or focus

My concepts on economics are much clearer than your buddy. I work of an investment bank, if that puts some perspective here. I do it for a living.

About Euro currently only being used by Iran for Oil rading- Iran is 4th largest producer of oil. And Venezuala is the second country. OPEC is considering it as well. Google for “Iran’s New Oil Trade System Challenges U.S. Currency” and “OPEC chief muses about gradually switching oil pricing to euros” and update yourself. There is a propensity to make this change given the unstable nature and risks with USD. Go do some research, you need the knowledge to stop making ignorant comments.

Also, Russia is considering shifting to another currency. Reason for it? Because USD is a debt backed currency, and the US govt debt has gone up exponentially, with a Trillion worth of debt between July and Oct, and faster after it. So much so, that the National debt clock design couldn’t accommodate the numbers. Do you know the impact of that in the long term? (Emphasis being on ”long term” while you keep quoting the current rise of dollar, which is short term and Myopic at best) I guess not and that’s why you are hoping that USD will do well and US will stay the economic super power that it is, in the long term. And it is hope rather than confidence that it will happen for real. Hope is a good thing, so keep hoping.

And inspite of what you hope for, China is asking for a new reserve currency already. An unprecedented development, which is expected to become norm as well.

First time ever China (USA’s biggest creditor) is also casting doubts on US Try notes. Google for ”china worried for US investments” and you will find news items. Do you even know what that means? That means US losing credibility. Debt being related to USD’s value, what does that mean? Figure out for yourself. If your tiny brains can’t comprehend it, then let me know. I will explain. And learn to live with it and not defend it. Pranab Mukherjee said something on living in denial to Pakistan – You are living in denial as well. Hope it is temporary, for your own sake.

Keep up the Kud Kud

@Naddu
I know PDA is not your idea, but you are trying to impose it on us(indians). I do know about eroticism and Kamasutra are a topic that is very much associated with MY country not with yours. I am not ignoring or denying this part of our tradition.
Having said that, i don’t see any reason why WE(Indians) should practice PDA against OUR wish.
Do you expect Indians to show you all the sex positions depicted in Kamasutra or Khajoorao……………….on the streets of India?
Sorry you won’t get any volunteer for that in India, not even prostitutes, they will also refuse to do so, let alone other people.
If PDA hasn´t been invented by people from western countries, and if it´s a human gesture widespread all over the world since many centuries, let the “human beings” of india decide whether they want it or not, you don’t take decisions on OUR behalf.
Dear Naddu why only harmless kissing and caressing and why not harmless sexual intercourse and other sexual activities among loving couple?
Otherwise also as you said these people won´t attack my country, so why are you depriving these loving couples from achieving “orgasms” in “Public”?
after all according to you they just try to live a happy life, so let them be “completely satisfied” with their act.
Don’t ask me to get rid of my class thinking and i won’t ask you to get rid of your pseudo modern thinking. It’s a deal.
I LOVE MY INDIA……..WATAN MERA INDIA.
Happy weekend,take care
Rahul

@aussie
I completely agree on points you raised, but these are our internal problems, like “black and white” problems of western countries.
Every country in the world has it’s own internal problems, no country is perfect.
“SECOND RATED CITIZEN” is not BIG for me because I AM NOT ONE OF THEM.
and dear aussie SECOND RATED CITIZENSHIP is not an excuse, it’s fact faced by millions of NRI’s all over the world.
yeah, you are right, i am indeed living in a comfort zone of my country………..that’s INDIA.

@Prerna,

you are absolutely right!!! He´s infact trying to make up his mind for others and claims to belong to a majority. Fact is, that the so called majority lives in fear and not in freedom.
Why would he call my indian friends cowards when they prefer to not express their feelings in public being scared of facing trouble? Actually he´s very conscious about the problem.

@ Rahul,
I´m not Indian! I´m a western woman without any relations or familiar connections to India.
When you don´t have the wish to practice PDA you cannot conclude that all indians have the same attitude. Obviously there are others too. Scroll back and check their comments.
Are you the spokesperson of India??? I doubt! I think you overestimate yourself.

Naddu

One very Blunt Statement: I am sure it will ignite some fire.

If some one is looking for a decent girl, Please look abroad. I have first hand experience how bad situation is in India(MODERN WESTERN CITIES IN INDIA).

Liberty has never come from the government. Liberty has always come from the subjects of it. The history of liberty is a history of resistance.
Many politicians are in the habit of laying it down as a self-evident proposition that no people ought to be free till they are fit to use their freedom. The maxim is worthy of the fool in the old story who resolved not to go into the water till he had learned to swim.

Who speaks of liberty while the human mind is in chains?

The greatest dangers to liberty lurk in insidious encroachment by men of zeal, well-meaning but without understanding.

Naddu

Dear Ashu,

have you been offended by introduction of internet, tv, car, motorbike, mp3 player, teabag, jeans trousers, aspirin, x-rays, freezer, Mc. Donalds, mobile phone, bicycle?

These western inventions had a great impact on your daily life and still have, they improved your life quality! Or am I wrong?

Why don´t you stop using them, when you use your mobile phone I´m sure you hurt somebody else who doesn´t want to see it, because he hasn´t got the money to purchase it.
See how small definition of freedom can be. When you smoke and another one is sitting next to you…how is that? When somebody is having a phonetalk in a restaurant and you feel disturbed by it, do you raise your voice? These are all private matters the public has to bear. Every raised your voice because of it?
How can a kiss in public cause a mental pain? That´s something I don´t and will never be able to understand.
Ashu, have you ever been abroad? How will you broaden your mind when you sit in a country without experiencing any difference? I grant you your limited way of thinking.

Don´t use your mobile phone in public, you may provoke a poor one that much that he´s going to kill you because you have the freedom to own one and he doesn´t it!

Are you aware???

Stop to insinuate free thinking people that they want to see copulating people in the public!
You attempt to polarize!

Greetings,
Naddu

Naddu
Firstly its not me. We are talking about Indian public sentiments. And answer is “No” Indian public is not offended by X ray, freezer and what not, because they are not odds with Indian culture. You just try to fit in any example to prove your point. Ain’t it? Don’t u check for relevance?
Any thing is acceptable, as long as it doesn’t create a conflict with current sentiments/rule. These things don’t create conflict, so they are fine. And Indian public decides what creates their conflict and thus not acceptable/not acceptable. You can’t say that they should accept freezer along with PDA or don’t accept freezer at all. Else going by the same logic, next demand can be ”British like curry, so they should adopt PDA standards of India”. Right logical reasoning? Nope
By saying that smoking and loud talk on phone is same as PDA and creates problem/pain, you are accepting that it does create problems/uncomfort. Thanks for accepting it. Now next thing is, accepting the pain. Indian public mostly decide to not bear it. And you are saying that they should bear it. So, is that a choice that they have ? or you are going to make it for them? Back to my point of forcing stuff on people.
“How can a kiss in public cause a mental pain? That´s something I don´t and will never be able to understand” – That’s the problem. You don’t understand. You don’t understand a different perspective. To you only ur perspective is supreme
To answer your question – You are not reading properly. I am an NRI, I have travelled across Europe, APAC and North America. I have broadened my perspective, liked what other cultures have to offer. Didn’t scoff at PDA in other countries, however also not narrowed my perspective to India. You have broadened and then narrowed it to believe that Western way is the only way. I throw the same accusation back at you, ‘limited way of thinking’. You say that – My freedom is the only freedom, I don’t care about anyone else’s freedom to feel comfortable or make a choice. Yo ant to make choice for other people
Mobile phone example- Example of violence. Not relevant. My freedom to own phone is no at odds with a poor person’s freedom to own it. He has freedom, and not the money. It is a not a freedom discussion. Get it?
You said “Stop to insinuate free thinking people that they want to see copulating people in the public! You attempt to polarize!” – You still don’t get it. Do you? I am testing all the theories that you are throwing around. Which when tested in extreme situation, don’t hold good. And that’s true to not just Indian public, but yourself as well. Your actions and thoughts are misaligned

ah and I have responded back to yours. Hope you don’t mind my response

Dear Ashu,

what actions of mine do you mean, till now it´s been all a theory or thought process?
Elaborate please? You tend to interpret.
Why do you need to test theories that have already been prooved?

Please elaborate what exactly hurts your sentiment when you see a happy couple expressing this love in public? You defend the so called common sentiment of Indians.
You are inconsistent when you say it doesn´t disturb yourself but it disturbs Indians, at the same time you are referring to common indian sentiments, are you indian or not?
I understand that you identify yourself with your country, you are emotionally involved.

What is your point? Which of indian sentiment is getting disturbed by PDA?
Is it immoral to kiss someone in public? Is it dirty to kiss in public? Who dares to define this moral?
I still don´t see a certain reason.
I understand that you may be worried of moral degeneracy, which special moral do you mean?

Moral degeneracy happens when people act careless. An expression of love and affection won´t lead to this in my eyes. There are other factors responsible for careless behaviour, like, present extreme social differences, the feeling of unfair treatment, exclusion/isolation of certain groups in a society. What about the muslims in your country. I´m sure they would start a revolt would you liberate affection in public, are you maybe afraid of them???

The law says, obscenity in public isn´t permitted. In my perception I feel it´s more obscene when people have to do their daily hygiene on the roads, it´s a very private, intimate matter. Would you wash yourself and shave in public? You would certainly not, you had he chance to develope another moral in this matter!
Good that his freedom is there, by our western moral standards it wouldn´t be accepted.
This would affect the general impression of a neat and clean, structured and safely ordered country
where moral values and special standards are a part of the Code of Law.
I´m very conscious that the accepted standards of morality differ extremely in different countries.

I don´t think the western way is the only way. But I know I live in one of the safest countries in the world, not because we are morally degenerated, we have developed and defined a moral in our freedom, our law and order works there, where it´s necessary and required.

We had different views about obscenity in the 60ies, 70ies, 80ies, 90ies, and nowadays, the degree of obscenity is also subjected to changes.
When you live in a global system, you won´t manage to escape from multiple changes, apart from economic changes.
Due to the speed of this drastic changes nowadays, I understand that a majority in India is sceptical and worried. The change happens faster than people manage to cope with, mentally.

Nevertheless – anyone should have the freedom to decide for himself what to adapt, what to deny. Leave it to the individual, don´t try to force them to do things they aren´t convinced about, they´ll do it in secret or will throw a bomb to achieve it with violence. (greetings to the Taliban)

The other way: A few courageous people just try it over and over again, until the mainstream has realized, that a kiss doesn´t affect the personal freedom of others or the entire moral of a country.

Naddu

@PRERNA

VIRUS ALERT: I was at Adelaide Airport yesterday while my Laptop picked VIRUS W32.SPYBOT.WORM from Airport Server.(Wireless Network Auto Selection).

I VIRTUALLY WENT THROUGH HELL TO REMOVE IT. I HAVE SYMANTEC INTERNET SECURITY. IT NEVER REMOVED IT.(Software said it is removed and ask computer to restart but it never get removed. It keep corrupting system and system32 and windows files).

IT IS WORST WORM I HAVE EVER CAME ACROSS. I ENDED UP LOOSING MY SOLIDWORK SOFTWARE AND LOTS MORE.

“AVOID “THIS DIRTY WORM”.

TO PRERNA, NADDU AND ALL THE SUPPORTERS OF PDA
please read this piece of news carefully:
MUMBAI: The Vakola police registered an FIR against actor Akshay Kumar, his wife Twinkle Khanna and the organisers of Lakme Fashion Week late on
Saturday. Akshay, the brand ambassador of Levi’s jeans, unveiled its Unbuttoned brand at the Lakme Fashion Week on Tuesday at the Grand Hyatt, Santa Cruz. A social worker, Anil Nair, then submitted a written application to the police, urging them to book the actor and show organisers for indecent, vulgar and obscene behaviour.

“We saw newspaper clippings and video footage of the show before registering an FIR under Section 294 of the IPC. A public prosecutor was also consulted,” senior inspector S Neklikar said. The offence is bailable. “We will now record statements of people in the audience. Arrests won’t take place immediately.”

Section 294 refers to doing any obscene act in public or singing or reciting any obscene song in public. If convicted, the accused can face imprisonment that may extend to three months, or a fine, or both. “We want to ensure that the case stands in court. We will examine related material and take the opinion of several legal experts,” an officer said.

Akshay, who’s in South Africa at present, was not available for comment despite repeated attempts. Those present at the fashion show said Akshay had walked half the ramp at which point a model went up to the actor and tried to unbutton his jeans. The actor refused and moved towards his wife Twinkle, seated in the audience, and asked her to unbutton it.

“Akshay has been bestowed with an honour like the Padma Shri and should not be doing what he did in public. He should give a public apology,” Nair had told TOI on Thursday.
NOW PLEASE CARRY ON YOUR DEBATE
Thanks and regards
Rahul

Rahul

Akshay Kumar contributes Millions in Taxes which helps the nation and I congratulate him for what he has achieved in life. He is a family man. A boy from a Dish Cleaning Job in Hong Kong to the top of the world(and he is not Khan or Kapoor), I admire his achievements.

By the who who is Anil Nair?.

aussie

Your information about Akshay Kumar is perfect.
But dear if he booked under Section 294 of the IPC, then in the court of law, judge will not give the judgment depending on whether he contributes Millions in Taxes or risen from dish cleaning man to stardom.
Judgment will be passed based purely on the case in point i.e. charge of indecent, vulgar and obscene behaviour.
I also don’t know who is this Anil Nair, but he has put the Akshay Kumar in a tight spot, that’s for sure.
Don’t worry now Akshay Kumar will also know who is Anil Nair, but in a hard way.

TO RAHUL ,.
iN section 294 of the IPC which u r quoting, what constitues indecent’vulgur and obscene behavior has not been defined. That has been left to the subjective judgement. So most complaints filed under this section have been quashed by the judges of various courts in India. Because the judge has refused to interpret an act as an obscene which the complainanit [some fool like Anil Nayar in this case] found obscene. Also most of these complainants r rogues who want publicity. Courts therefore also fined some of the complainaints in the past for wasting the time of the court .
So u see there is no objective definition of indecency and vulgarity. U found Akshay’s act indecent while i found it beautiful nd divine. The Victorians earlier used to cover the legs of the chairs. Because they thought that uncovered legs of chairs was obscene. i dont think that u would find the same obscene. take care.love ankur

TO AUSSIE ON MOTHER FUCKER MAHATMA ,THE FRAUD MOTHER AND THE BEAUTIFUL LINCON,
How r u dear? Whom do i respect? Well i respect u for ur goodness and knowledge. I respect everybody around. But i definitely dont respect the Mahatma. India didn’t get independence because of the sacrifices and speeches of Mahatma. India got independence because Churchill lost and Clement Attlee became the British prime minister. Had Churchill won ,the British would not have left india in 1947.
That i talk freely and comment my posts on Yaari didn’t come because of Gandhi’s sacrifice. It came firstly, because the British came to india and introduced the English language,. Secondly because the Americans invented Internet. And thirdly a very rich girl of indian origin called Prerna started Yaari. U tell me where does Gandhi come in this.
A debate has already started on the actual work that Mother Teresa did. Most Scholars on Teresa have concluded that Mother Teresa didn’t do that great a work. She was more of a publicity hound,. Even Ram Krishna Mission has done more work in Calcutta THAN Teresa’s missionaries of charity. aN year before her death she wrote a letter to a cardinal of Vatican who was her friend. She agonized that she had wasted her life in pretending and posing for the Western media.
Lincoln was truly a gem of a man. So i agree with u. And i live in New Delhi. And i have only an Indian passport. Whenever u r delhi inform me. It would be a pleasure o meet u nd host u.take care.love ankur.

TO ANKUR
please read this latest development of akshay kumar case:
courtesy IBNLive.com
The Santacruz based social activist Anil Nair, Thursday, filed a written complaint at the Vakola police station against the actor, his wife Twinkle Khanna and the event organisers for obscenity in public.
Akshay Kumar apologised for the same soon after. “If I have hurt anyone’s sentiments with my actions, I am sorry because I did not mean to,” he said.
According to Nair, Akshay Kumar being an idol for the youth today has shamed the nation with his behaviour. He should not only apologise but also return the Padma Shri award he was honoured with on March 31.
“Many mothers complained to me about the indecent behaviour at the show and asked me to take up the matter with the police,” said Nair.

take care. love Rahul

Naddu

My comment
April 5th, 2009 at 10:05 am was for you

Ashu,

if you will forgive me saying so, I find you are an arrogant intolerant bum. ) Who tries to “force” any standard or moral in India by discussing it here? Are you in possession of your senses? Where´s your logic here? That´s an absolute nonsens statement.
I articulate myself and when you have a problem with it, I can´t help it. When you feel threatened by a women or standards coming from the west, I feel you are nothing but a coward.

You seem to live in a very adventureous world there. I hope you don´t suffer from delusion of persecution.
You yourself are inconsistency personified, naming others intolerant by not tolerating their views, by trying to detect any failure or inconsistency line by line…I even think you suffer from an inferiorty complex.
If you need an appointment… come over!

Naddu

Since this is nothing about the topic or debate anymore, but an effort to pull down people, I just signoff for good from this forum.

Naddu…. you disgust me

Sorry Ashu,

I got fed up with your ways.

Didn´t mean it really. I felt you too missed to keep a certain form of respect by your personal responses to me.
Take it with humour.

Naddu

“A public display of affection (sometimes abbreviated PDA) is the physical demonstration of affection for another person while in the view of others. Holding hands or kissing in public are commonly considered to be unobjectionable forms of public displays of affection. But what is considered objectionable depends on the context. For example, in places such as bars, nightclubs, and strip clubs more extreme forms of public displays of affection are rarely considered to be objectionable. In these places, acts such as grinding and french kissing are common.[citation needed] It is traditional at the conclusion of a Western wedding for the couple to kiss.

While generally considered to be an American term, every culture has written and/or unwritten rules governing the display of affection in public. Individual and societal views on the public display of affection vary significantly. Such displays may sometimes be considered to be in bad taste, while in some jurisdictions such displays may even be criminal. Depending on the social values and context, extreme forms of public displays of intimacy may be considered indecent exposure.

If the partners enjoy being seen affectionate towards each other in public, it may be considered a mild form of exhibitionism. Alternatively, the partners may be indifferent that others see them, and therefore are not inhibited by it. Finally, the partners may prefer more privacy, but may simply tolerate being seen by others. Some may find it pleasant to view others public displays of affection, which may be considered a form of voyeurism.

In many societies, public displays of affection may be tolerated even less among minority couples. For example, gay couples could be at risk of encountering aggression from disapproving onlookers. While such public displays of affection could trigger hate violence, some gay rights advocates have used public displays of affection as a means of defiance, treating them as political acts. For example, at McGill University, the Queer McGill organization stages “kiss-ins” in which gay couples kiss in public areas on the university’s campus. In many places around the world, couples of differing race, religion, or tribe may be subject to similar intolerance.”

In India PDA is not common.

For more, visit http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Public_display_of_affection

wonderful Prem, you have done a good job.
Rgdrs-JBS Negi

I live in Iran and as you know these days we have
more problems with this stupid government and stupid public beliefs
which conform such behaves. However I think we should protest and
try to change the situation. I conform your approach strongly and I hope
your invitation to respect human rights including public display of affection
, which is in my opinion a kind of “freedom of speech”, would be heard by
all people.

dear prerna,

the kiss is physical transaction of two x 2 lips is it?
when these situation arise ?
out of kiss, what is forward path?
do you justify the forward path or you will retrict the justifying till kiss in public.

off cource , i fully agree that in want of such social out lets and day by day condensation of social transaction imotional outlets are not only getting restrcted but are bcloked..

nas

i fully share your views. excellent writeup!

hi,

wat wil u say to fathers who are raping their daughters, any laws for them????

“country’s continued backwardness regarding all things sexual.” – what is ‘backwardness’ related to sexual things? Can’t you think different countries have different ways? I do not understand why it should be considered ‘backward’ if you do anything other than what western countries do. Instead of presenting anything to assert your point that kissing / sexual activity in public is good you just say ‘backwardness’ Can you tell why kissing / sexual activity in public is good?
Where do you draw the line to ’show bit of affection’ and why can not you go by the norm?
My question is how do you decide what kind of sexual activity in public is good?
How do you set the example for public behaviour? Based on pictures on the walls?
“parks or beaches or other such romantic places” – VOW!! you find the railway station / bus stand ‘romantic place’ to make love?
If that is the case why do you need beach / park?
Do you want to have beach / park or since you do not find them you want to have sex in public?
Do you have kids?
Don’t you think teen agers have love / affection?

Dear Prerna,
Very well written. I endorse your views absolutely. Nothing but a social revolution will bring about a welcome change in our “moral” values.
Will you kindly read my blog: http://snoopysinquiries@blogspot.com/
Regards,
Govind

gr8 totally agree with u

Dear Prama,

Yes in few occusion I am agree with you but in other word is it possible to make it happen waht you immagine. And I think this is the contrast of life. Society shoul have some guide line and abide by soem roule of law and its the community who will decide waht will be their law or guide line. Ofcourse same story is not appliocable for every societ as I am in Bangladesh. There are difernts in rural and urban and for global context. But problem is our mind set

Shahid

Hi Prerna
Greetings!
I am very much agree with your opinion. Its good that you have taken initiative to stand against such a false ideology of life and prohibition of personal freedom. There are alot of issues that we should stand agaist.
We are with you.

Gopal Krishna Sonwani
Dehradun

thanks Prerna, i think kissing is not allowed at public places but married couple are allowed at not public places but if they are alone in garden or other romentic places they can kiss.

in my opinion, there should be no objection if a couple show affection in a decent manner.
after all love is a natural thing.

I agree with you. I think its perfectly alright to kiss in Public.

See you soon.

Prerna

April 5th, 2009 at 9:10 pm (Above post), is for you

@Ashu — no I do not believe that Hindus are, in this day and age, squirmish about Muslims worshiping publicly. but i do know that public worship of a minority religion was illegal in many countries in years past (including india). but slowly people realized that religious freedom is important, and so they began to tolerate different religions. it is because religious freedom is protected by law that Hindus do not feel squirmish when Muslims worship publicly. in the same way, i’m sure if we allow kissing in public, the next generation of Indians will not feel squirmish about it.

Naddu

Yes, I missed to keep certain form of respect. And who did I take the lead from? Yourself
Please read your post ” Naddu Wrote: April 2nd, 2009 at 10:11 am” I was not going down the path till you started saying words like “Got it?” , “Ever heard”, backing off on Voyeuristic ideas” etc.
After that post I got down to the same level as you

However, after your post yesterday, which was couple of notches down more, I had a choice to go down at that level, or leave it at that. And I decide to not compete on this front of insulting people. I don’t want to play this game. Period.

Ankur and yourself can play that game. I will just not respond to any such comments.

@ NADDU

I find it amazing, shocking and disappointing that you are actually telling Mr. “AN-KUD-KUD” (Ankur for the uninitiated), who is quite obviously a frustrated pervert who has, IN HIS OWN WORDS, not achieved anything substantial in his life and who does not pay tax becoz he does not earn that much to have to pay tax (hopefully he will soon earn enough to pay taxes, he has my good wishes), and of course, who abuses like there is no tomorrow and who has not the slightest decency and manners to talk like a civilised person in a public forum, that you “love the rebel in him” and that “he has the guts to be different”!!! If u consider abusing endlessly and profanity as “being different”, then I am afraid you really need to change your entire concepts of what constitutes “being different”, Naddu! And to think that you are “supposedly” a doctor!!! I honestly suggest you check yourself first and get your thinking straight and THEN come back to this forum and comment.

And another thing, don’t bother giving any “hugs” to this Ankur fellow – he has stated UNEQUIVOCALLY what he wants from you – he wants to “read between your legs”. Now YOU figure out what that means – you’re “supposedly” a doctor, I’m sure you know EXACTLY what that means!! This Ankur guy is nothing but a pervert!!! I honestly suggest Prerna to get this forum moderated for such abusive comments, otherwise it will become like a free-for-all! I’d like a response from you on this, PRERNA – you respond to many other comments, I think this one needs to be addressed on an urgent basis!

And ANKUR, please moderate your comments, whatever it is you want to say, you can say it but in a CIVILISED MANNER!!! Please do not prove yourself to be an animal and an uncivilised and uncouth person! I could not give a damn what you think about our investment banker friend, Ashu, that is your problem, but by using abusive language, you’re not getting yourself anywhere and only bringing yourself down in other people’s eyes. At least Ashu says whatever he wants to in a decent way without having to resort to profanity! And another thing, your comments about “girls considering you a gentleman” are laughable! Even if by come miracle they do, the day they read your profanity-filled comments on this website, they will drop you like a hot potato (if you have one in the first place, that is!). Stop showing your insecurities here and please start behaving like a mature human being.

Sincerely,

Harit.

@prerna
as you said the recognition of a new minority’s rights is always a slow process.
our next generation may follow PDA.
but right now…………..nah.
and please raise your voice for those under privileged westerners who wants to follow nudity in Public places.
otherwise also you yourself is not a follower of either PDA or nudity in public.
now “preach” what you are not going to “follow”……..yeah that’s right……..nudity in public place.

warm regards
Rahul

TO NADDU MY LOVE U BETRAY ME,
That first u hold me in the warmth of ur hug. And then two scraps down u chuck me off at the behest of Mr Harit Shah. The moment of reckoning has come. U have to choose between Mr Harit Shah and me.
And there is only one way u can console my frustration. You know that way .So do that way….love ankur

TO MR HARIT SHAH AND ASHU,
Dear mr shah it would be my honour nd pleasure to host u when u r in delhi. So please do inform me when u r in delhi. Thanks for ur wishes about my future. I would also clarify that calling the Mahatma a mother-fucker is no profanity. To speak the truth is no profanity. Also u have to understand like u too i m an Indian. And i m part of that tiny group of Indians that aspires to transform India from its present decay into a beautiful society. Where there is full freedom of expression. Where there is prosperity and diversity. Where millions of unique individuals celebrate there unique lifestyles. Where freedom of the individual is more important than any culture and any religion. And for me the word “fucker” is as divine as the word “Ram”
Ashu u have accepted. That u say that Indian banks r in a lower grade than US banks. So why r u comparing them. You cannot compare somebody studying in standard 1 with somebody in high school. One thing i can assure u Ashu is that i m more brilliant than Premier Hu. And it doesn’t matter whether majority of public agrees with him. When Galileo claimed that the earth goes around the sun ,contrary to the Bible the public killed him.
The same China till 2008 was building its reserves madly in US dollars. That now dollar has taken a beating China is crying for a reserve currency.
The point Ashu is that throw away this socialist and outdated mindset of urs. Of America vs. India. It is the age where we have realized that we r co-inhabitants of this beautiful planet. Cooperation nd not conflict is the way to fulfill the needs of the 5 billion population of this planet. So its now America with India. Or more correctly it is IndiaAmerica.The two have merged.
Lastly i am sorry if i hurt u. I didn’t mean anything personal. To tell u the truth i found ur comments on economics highly intelligent and well informed. Not many investment bankers r so well-informed. They r limited to the knowledge of their trading desk. And know little beyond options nd futures. More so for the Indian investment bankers. So keep up the good work. But if u dont leave ur ego, that will block the flow of ur intelligence. So take care.love ankur.

as per india has great culture

Dear Ankur,

I thank you for your love, you are a delightful toolbox poet and a man that is able to raise his voice for a woman to help and defend her. Keep this great attitude and sensitivity.
Please don´t misunderstand when I fail to decide between Mr. Harit and you, I don´t insist to hurt anyone of you, Isn´t this the preferrable diplomatic way?

Of course, I know what you want, I wish I could fulfill your dreams, but please explain, how will I be able to screw you when I don´t have that required screwdriver?

Take care cheri´
Naddu

Dear Prerna,

I have recognised that conservatives in India have a strange and blooming fantasy regarding PDA.
Sex education is probably not a well known subject in India. Intelligent people confuse a kiss with sex, a hug with petting, and PDA with copulation on the streets, or PDA with nudity.
That´s a very interesting and intellectually stimulating association.

How is it there in the US, is sexual education a subject at schools?

Greetings,
Naddu
It may make sense to introduce this important education at indian schools.

TO NADDU
Refer following definitions of different terms used by you in your comment.
Kiss : Touch with the lips or press the lips (against someone’s mouth or other body part) as an expression of love, greeting, etc.
Hug : Squeeze (someone) tightly in your arms, usually with fondness
Petting : Affectionate play (or foreplay without contact with the genital organs)
Sex : All of the feelings resulting from the urge to gratify sexual impulses

Okay, now regarding PDA in USA
Many junior and senior high schools in the United States prohibit displays of affection, in an effort that many school administrators believe allows students to focus on learning. Such efforts may also be geared towards promoting abstinence among students. Another reason is the potential for liability as PDAs can, in extreme cases, be considered sexual harassment. Also, in the United States Armed Forces, PDA is strongly discouraged and looked down upon, especially in uniform.

Dear Naddu, all the above things have been said by the “intelligent” people, not me.
Now go and try to change the attitude of US government and then talk about India, of course……..My India.

Regards
Rahul

To Rahul,

I have not asked for PDA in the US, I asked if there´s something like SEXUAL EDUCATION taught at school.

First read a question, transport this question to your brain, develope a rational thought and then comment, incase your comment was asked for! That´s the usual way of a thought process!

Thank you,
Naddu

TO HARIT, ASHU ,RAHUL ND OPPONENTS OF PDA,
my question to u all:
Q) Where would u prefer to send ur daughters, girlfriends, wives alone? In a country where there r lot of young couples kissing each other on the streets. And woman moving around without any restriction. Or to a country where there is no culture of Public Display of affection and where there r lots of lonely men on the streets with few women concealing themselves in unnecessary clothing.
Which of the above two countries would u think it is safer to send ur daughters or girlfriends or wives alone. Answer that and u will get ur answer.take care.love ankur.

TO ANKUR
Out of your two options i will definitely prefer second one.
That is to a country where there is no culture of Public Display of affection and where there r lots of lonely men on the streets with few women concealing themselves in unnecessary clothing.
Honest and straight forward answer.
take care.love Rahul

Rahul

“I appreciate your love for Indian Culture & Values. I am sure you will do good service for the “less fortunate” cummunities and people.

As far as Akshay Kumar is concerned, don’t worry about him. He has risen from dust to stardom. He knows how to handle his public and private life.
As far as Anil Nair is concerned, 15 Minutes fame does not make any one “Social Worker”.

Mother Teressa was social worker. Steve Waugh is social worker(He spend months in India). I am not suure if ever Anil Nair touched hand of any poor and helped him.

THOSE WHO PAY TAX(ES) AND HUGE TAX ARE “ASSET” TO THE NATION.

THOSE WHO ASK “GOVT” TO DO SOME THING FOR THEM ARE LIABILITIES.

US originated Joke (Not Indian joke)

Why the US is in crisis – Something I couldn’t resist sharing.

An Israeli doctor says ‘Medicine in my country is so advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man, put it in another, and have him looking for work in six weeks.’

A German doctor says ‘That is nothing; we can take a lung out of one person, put it in another, and have him looking for work in four weeks.

The Russian doctor says ‘In my country, medicine is so advanced that we can take half a heart out of one person, put it in another, and have them both looking for work in two weeks..’

An American Texas doctor, not to be outdone, says ‘You guys are way behind, we recently took a man with no brains out of Texas, put him in the White House for eight years, and now half the country is looking for work.’

————————

And a take on the greedy Inv bankers. This is brilliant

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z-oIMJMGd1Q

Rahul,

On the P&L question – I am a bit tired of typing and would like to type less (Though my next post might be very controversial -I have to find time for it though)

If you can provide me your phone contact at the mail address ashu_sharmaa@yahoo.com, I can call you to discuss. In my mind, it is not a straight forward answer unfortunately

Definitely Rahul,

If your question was about “who can”. Auditors have best chances of discovering corp gov breaches. And I am assuming that CFO is hand in glove. If he is not, then he has best chances of finding it at org level.

How is th more complicated one and there can be thousand different ways and thus no straight forward answer

Rahul,

when you are unable to respect personal addressed comments and you feel you have the right to answer instead of the person who was asked, you haven´t understood the simple and common standards of communication and etiquette. You ask others to force not anything on you, and you force your unwanted replies on people who don´t want to hear them.
Leave it. I remind you of your recent sentence that you want to skip my comments, keep your word or you appear to be inconsisten!!!
I will not feel tempted to respond to any of your comments anymore. It´s a waste of time.
Period!

regards,
Naddu

Ashu,
you are absolutely right.
100 out of 100 marks for that, indeed there can be thousand different ways and thus no one answer.

Regards
Rahul

Sexual repression is nothing new. Many societies around the world place restrictions on the sex lives of their citizens, often with heavy consequences should an individual deviate from what is considered acceptable in that society. Adulterers, unwed lovers, homosexuals, and even people caught in the act of masturbating have been institutionalized, tortured, mutilated, or even executed for committing acts of sexual gratification.

While we no longer hang people for having sex out of wedlock or clamp spiked rings over the penises of masturbators, we can still hear the harpies of morality screeching their anti-sex agendas from pulpits and campaign platforms across the country. Concerned citizens boycott stores that carry literature about certain forms of sexual activity and lobby to squash anything remotely resembling sexual education in our schools. Television and radio producers are fined and chastised if their programming is deemed to be too racy for those moral-minded, sensitive American audiences. Adult-oriented establishments are greatly restricted in their activities, watched like hawks, and heavily fined or shut down completely for whatever whimsical reason the vice squads can dream up.

Even in the privacy of their own homes, citizens are strongly discouraged against practicing any type of sexual activity outside of mundane and marital pairings. And while some bold groups of open-minded individuals may stand up and claim their right to have sex with whomever and however they’d like, they quickly find themselves being held up as the poster children for everything that is wrong in America. Oh, how a much better place the USA would be if we didn’t have all those pesky homosexuals, masturbators, swingers, fetishists, and fornicators around, they say.

I say rubbish.

Some of the side effects of sexual repression as observed in human beings include lack of self-confidence, low self-esteem, depression, suicidal tendencies, and higher aggressive behavior. A child who has been taught to believe that sex is dirty and bad will often mature to become an adult who is self-conscious about his body and overwhelmed with guilt when the natural desire to breed arouses him. Adults who are restricted in their sexual inclinations will often experience frustration that can result in either suicidal actions or violence towards others.

It should come as a surprise to no one that societies that have more relaxed legislature over sexual matters enjoy a lower violent crime rate and are not often seen butting heads with other societies on the war field. This phenomenon was best documented in a study of one of our closest relatives, the Bonobo ape.

Bonobos, closely related to chimpanzees and also sharing more than 98 percent of the human genetic profile, are a species of primate which uses sexual activity not only for reproduction but also for social bonding. Bonobos have been observed to be indiscriminate in their sexual relations in regards to age or gender, and also are considered to be one of the more peaceful groupings of animals on the planet. Unlike chimpanzees and other animals that have a dominant-male or a strictly monogamous structure, the Bonobos are not often observed being aggressive towards one another over food, mates, or territory.

Even in human studies, sexual relief has been proven an effective remedy for anxiety, stress, and even some forms of depression. The personal vibrator itself was originally designed as a medical tool for doctors to use on their female patients to “relieve hysteria.” (Strangely enough, masturbating was considered to be an extremely unhealthy activity at the time, but it was OK if a physician did it for you.)

Numerous medical professionals, psychologists, philosophers, and other champions of sexual liberation and its benefits to society have been defamed and their work bastardized by political and religious leaders on the platform of morality and wholesome family values. Citizens of such societies are therefore instructed to deeply repress many of their strong natural urges and desires, resulting in an increase of frustration, stress, and emotional instability that is disguised with the mask of being “the right thing to do.”

Often this opens the door wide for religion, particularly the brands that demand their followers forsake earthly delights and suppress all natural inclinations as proof of being a good and worthy person. Never has the idea of how sexual repression can result in aggressive behavior been better demonstrated than with the history of the followers of such religions butchering and torturing other peoples whose attitudes on such subjects differed from their own. Nor is it a coincidence that the punishments dealt to such people often involved the mutilation of their sexual organs.

Even in modern times, we find an astounding number of violent sex crimes committed by perpetrators who speak of sexual repression and insecurity when interrogated. While the moral-minded platform speakers would have us believe that such criminal behavior is a model example of what people would be like if we were free to do as we pleased sexually, they fail to acknowledge that such crimes are often committed as the result of intense and long-term suppression of sexual desires.

One observation that counters the idea that sex crimes are the result of being exposed to an environment with relaxed moral codes is the fact that when some countries legalized pornography or other forms of sexual gratification, the rate of such crimes decreased dramatically, even by as much as 50 percent.

Just as an animal will either sink into an unhealthy, lethargic depression or go violently mad when confined to a small cage and denied freedom to abide by its nature, so will humans who are restricted by cages of sexual morality.

Naddu,
First of all i must congratulate you for not dragging india and indians in it.
Secondly, i completely agree with you on each and every word written in this article.
But Naddu don’t you think people will conveniently interpret it as advocacy for “free sex”?
Actually this is a complex issue and dealt with carefully otherwise it’s sanctity will go and we will revert back to animal kingdom.
All the philosophers, sociologists, psychologist and even scientist are worried about this catastrophic effect.
It is easier said than done.
I hope you will agree with me.
Thanks and regards
Rahul

And Naddu,

where did i offend or degrade women who have their own piece of mind, on this forum?
if i did so then it’s definitely qualify to call as mobbing!

Regards
Rahul

@Naddu
Thanks again for calling my country india, “a beautiful country”.
I can’t describe you in words how i feel, when i see our national flag tricolour (Tiranga)or when i see our soldiers in uniform.
If there is a reincarnation i will prefer India again as my birth place.
I know there are problems in my country, it’s not perfect, but still i really love my country India.
I hope you understand my feelings, nothing personal, but if anybody says anything against india (and especially NRIs), i can’t tolerate it, i take it as abuse.

Warm Regards
Rahul

TOLERANCE:
Tolerance implies no lack of commitment to one’s own beliefs. Rather it condemns the oppression or persecution of others.

Dear,
I think there Nothing Obscene or Bad about sex. These categories are developed by modernization. As per my view just think for a while. If any body kisses his/her partner or shows his/her private things, what is bad about it..we all knows the anatomy and what is under the skirt or under the pant ? right ! then why we categarise and why society & all made it as a punishable act. When we shows are hands, legs, even open back, its not obscene ? then why for sex parts ?

Every body can see a child without cloth ? then why showing the grown body is wrong ? though parts are same only SIZE is different ?

So. I think these subjects are just making life commertialism..And we can only wait to see things to change with time …

Dear Ganapathy
You are great.
Now just do one thing to prove your point beyond doubt.
Go to any busy street of India or railway or bus station, where there are number of people present.
Then open the zip of your pant remove it and remove your underwear also.
and taking your penis in hand masturbate and don’t stop till ejaculation.
don’t worry about the public everybody in the public especially men have same part which you have but may be sizes are different, and women are also know about male masturbation.
So Ganapathy, don’t wait, quick go and act………..public is waiting for you.
All the best.

When facing a change, most people invariably feel insecure, lost and overwhelmed.

Still, do you agree with me that life without any form of changes would not only be monotonous but also inconceivable?

Afterall, one aspect of why we all love living, is the excitement and anticipation of the unexpected in our lives!

Here is a thought for you. What do you say to yourself after having had a really bad day?

If you’re like the majority of people, you’ll probably be happy it is over when you go to bed. Maybe saying something like this to yourself: “Phew I’m darn glad, this day is over… wonder what tomorrow will bring!” In expectation of a change.

Do you see what I mean? Every single day brings certain form of changes into our lives. In fact these small changes, are crucial. For they offer new opportunity and create room for adjustments.

So why are many people afraid of facing changes, if these are there to help us?

In psychology there are a number of reasons that can render a person fearful of a change. But I am not about to launch into a psycho-debate on the dysfunctionality of the mind here.

What I want to do, is to show you how you can quickly and easily banish those fears and enjoy a sense of freedom and inner security.

Fact 1. : People who are passionate about growing are never afraid of a change. To them change is simply another way of taking charge and living fully.

Irrelevant of their positions in life, they know that it is of utmost importance to keep an open mind and be alert in spirit. For nothing in life ever stays the same.

Fact 2. You can’t wish a change away. Your life would become more engaging and bountiful, when you can let go of your fear.

So without any further ado.

Build a strong relationship with your fear.

When a new change comes your way, tell yourself, what it is that you’re afraid of and look at the fear. You may even want to write it down. There’s something magical about writing things down.

Feel like you’re confiding in someone else, even if it’s only on paper. Once you face your fear, you’ll find that it begins to lose its power over you. Instead of you becoming enslaved, you now have the upper hand.

Play the devil’s advocate.

One reason for our fear of change is often because we feel inadequate. We feel that we are incapable of handling a new situation.

Should this be the case with you, simply see yourself in the worst case scenario.

Make yourself comfortable and allow your mind to re-live the various stages of what you fear at least twice. The third time around let the fear fade away like a smoke.

See yourself emerging from it wholesome, peaceful and invincible. Feel the joy of being in charge and the triumph of knowing the fear is only a shadow.

Reclaim your inborn power.

I know how frustrating it can be, if you’re trying to move forward and find yourself being held back by fear.

Once you’ve re-emerged feeling invincible, you want to use that momentum to turn things around.

To do this, ask yourself this question: “what simple action can I take here and now to start moving toward my new direction?”.

Wait for the answer to surface. Then do it without stalling. Should you get multiple ideas, just apply the one you feel comes easiest to you first. Moving later on to other ideas after you’ve completed the previous ones.

Test the waters for lurking “gremlins”.

To be certain that you’re now embarking on a steady path to overcoming your fear of change, do the following.

Subject yourself knowingly to your uncomfortable feel-ings around changes from time to time. This is to help you recognize the lurking fear i.e.the “gremlins”

Observe how you react: Do you immediately shut down or do you find yourself trying to be creative with the feelings?

The more constructive you can deal with your uneasy feelings about change, the quicker you’ll be able to move past your fear of change.

I firmly believe in asking for inner guidance. So if you find yourself still struggling with fear, don’t feel dejected, pray for help. It works wonder!
Laugh a lot, be joyful and give yourself to others. A heart full of joy and trust has no room for fear.

Take the time to integrate these steps into your life. Before long, you’ll find yourself getting more and more excited about new possibilities. The more you’re able to connect with and activate your innate power, the less susceptible you’ll be to fear of change.

@Rahul,

I think positive and also refer to positive changes, who would want a change to the worse ever?
Goes without a saying!

Greetings,
Naddu

@ Naddu

Thanks Naddu for clarification.
Don’t assume that no one would want a change to the worse ever.
There are sections of society who not only want but already practicing these changes, like terrorism, domestic violence, incest, child abuse, etc.
Back home on this forum only, refer the comments of “Ganapathy Jaikishan” and look, what he wants.

Regards
Rahul

@Rahul,

I found another interesting page that may